Shine Bright
by MX5
Summary: A Blues Brothers 2000 behind the scenes story. The dance choreographer for the movie, Julia, is full of hidden talents and surprises. Alan and Dan strike up a friendship with her but suddenly tragedy strikes...


Shine Bright  
Set during BB2K production/filming, etc.  
PART 1  
It was early June, the sun was shining brightly in the sky, birds squawked as they flew about and competed for neighboring birdbaths in the bright light. The air smelled of freshly cut grass with a hint of pine mixed in from the edge of the woods, lilac bushes were blooming, adding a fragrant perfume to the bouquet of smells in the atmosphere.  
Alan Rubin was lying on the couch downstairs in the living room when the phone rang shrilly in his ear and he grunted, reaching for the receiver on the end table to pick it up. He punched the green button and answered.  
"Hello?"  
"Alan?"  
"Yeah."  
"Danny. The production budget has been agreed on, so we start shooting the new movie in a few days. You all get to come back to Chicago." he could hear the smile in his old friend's face.  
"That's great, Danny. It'll be great to see you and the gang again." Alan smiled as he remembered the good times he had filming the first movie. Though it had been a flop, it was a cult success among Illinois and other parts of the globe. The trumpet player sat up on the couch and twirled the phone cord in one hand idly as he listened to his old friend.  
"Likewise. We'll see you when you get out here. You've got airfare covered and a ticket has been rush ordered. You should be getting it soon." Alan looked over at his calendar that his girlfriend had put up in the hallway nearby. So far it was clear, though he did have some recording sessions coming up in mid August.  
"Great. Who's doing the choreography for this movie?"  
"A great lady-you'll love her. Her name's Julia Holloway. She also plays trumpet and flute, I've heard."  
"Really? We'll have to jam sometime." his silver plated trumpet was fairly calling to him now. Alan always liked to jam with other trumpet players, it was a good way to make friends. Tom Malone was a decent trumpet player and the two frequently jammed together when they had the time.  
"Just get out here first, so we can get things moving." the doorbell rang. "Betcha it's Fedex so I'll see ya soon."  
"Bye, Danny." he hung up, clicking the phone off and crossing to the front door. His girlfriend was out and about that day, running errands and meeting friends.  
Alan signed for his delivery and opened it up, stripping the adhesive off of the flap with a loud ripping sound. He pulled out a first class ticket for Chicago, much to his delight. Danny always had a great mind for hospitality and always made sure his friends were comfortable. The trumpeter proceeded to make the arrangements with his schedule, making time for filming and recording the score. He packed up his Bach 72 trumpet, got his clothes in order, then made a list on what he needed to buy for the trip.  
The flight was for the early morning the next day and it was mid afternoon now, so Alan went out to his car, a 1997 Nissan Maxima, pulling out of the driveway to do shopping.

When he returned, his girlfriend Mae had just pulled up in her own car, a 1995 Honda Accord, and nearly hit her as she opened up the door without looking first. Alan swore, then picked up his bag and entered the house.  
"I had no idea you'd be summoned this fast," Mae remarked as she examined the plane ticket. "I talked to Danny yesterday."  
"Did you? Why didn't you tell me?"  
"He told me not to tell you, just in case the deal fell through. He didn't want to get your hopes up unnecessarily."  
"Sounds like Danny," he admitted as Mae tossed her shopping bags and purse down on the hall chair. "what'd you buy, the whole store?"  
"I'd have loved to do that!" she exclaimed, picking up one of the bags and pulling out a floral blouse. "There was a huge sale, so I made out like a bandit!" Mae pulled out a black colored scarf and tied it around her neck, striking a pose.  
"Crazy," Alan shook his head as though it couldn't be helped. "I have all the stuff I need for tomorrow, so I don't get to be nagged at, OK?" Alan injected some playfulness into his tone for her benefit so she didn't think he was being snappy.  
"All right. Planning ahead is good." Mae pecked him on the cheek and hugged him. "Maybe I'm rubbing off on you."  
"Nope!" Alan teased. "I didn't want you with me because it would have taken a lot longer to get my crap together with you nagging and whining."  
"I deserve some credit at least. You were worse than this when I first met you." she insisted.  
"I'm a man, I don't admit when I'm wrong." as if to prove his point, he pulled a beer out of the fridge, took off the cap, took a drink, and belched loudly, giving Mae a goofy look as she shook her head in pretend exasperation at him.  
"A true man would. It shows he has humility." she insisted, taking off the scarf and putting it back in the bag as he flopped back down on the couch and took another drink.  
"What's that?" Alan pretended to be clueless, earning a laugh and a playful swat.

Upon landing in Chicago late the next day, Alan had to adjust his watch so it read one hour back, he claimed his luggage, then marched out of the terminal to be met by John Landis.  
"Hey, Alan!" the director chirped merrily, shaking his hand. "Welcome back!"  
"Glad to be back. Where are we heading?" Alan grinned broadly, thinking he would always be fond of Landis. He really knew how to work with musicians and never made them feel inferior because they weren't professional actors. Landis looked almost exactly the same from when he had last seen him, he still exuded an almost maniacal energy that people responded well to.  
"The Hilton. Everyone's shacked up there so we'll all be comfortable."  
An unexpected bit of luxury, but Alan did not remark on it. He slung his trumpet case over his shoulder and followed the director out to the black Ford Explorer waiting at the door.  
"So," Landis said as they slid in back as the driver put the car in gear. "Lou and Steve arrived yesterday and we're waiting on Murph-he'll get in tonight sometime."  
"Right. So what do we do tomorrow? Score the music?"  
"Yeah. First thing tomorrow morning, you'll be getting the sheet music and we've got practice sessions all lined up. Our choreographer and her band of merry dancers will be nearby as they choreograph the numbers, so we'll get to mingle with them as well."  
"Convienent. I heard the choreographer does the trumpet as well." Alan put on his seat belt and shifted as the SUV hit a bump and his trumpet case was jostled.  
"Yeah, she does. She's not a professional, but she's pretty good. She plays her mother's flute too." Landis put a pair of clip-on shades over his glasses as the SUV pulled up to a stoplight.  
"Great. I can't wait to meet her."  
"She's a little shy, but when you get to know her, she'll be great."  
"Is she in the hotel like the rest of us?"  
"Yeah, a few floors down with Dan and John. Now, I have a copy of the script in case you want it, there's a binder with all the sheet music you'll need." Landis handed him two thick binders. "The call time for the practice sessions is 9 AM tomorrow morning."  
"I'll be there." Alan noticed they had pulled up to the hotel. He managed to get all his luggage to the room without incident, noticing that his roommate was Steve.  
After exchanging greetings with his old friends in the band, Landis and Danny called together a brief meeting where they reminisced briefly and all were handed out copies of an itinerary and shooting schedules for the next few weeks. The recording days were lined up for that week while in the afternoon the choreographer would work with them. The band already knew most of the songs, having performed with Eddie Floyd before several times.  
"Won't be the same without John," Duck muttered to himself. "poor guy." Alan and Tom mumbled agreements and looked over at Landis. The director wore an identical look, but it cleared off in a moment as he handed over Danny's copy of the script back to him.  
"I'll meet you guys in the recording room tomorrow morning at 9 AM!" Landis clapped his hands together in excitement, exuding energy as the others stood up and began to leave the room.

****  
When the morning dawned, Alan woke up, had breakfast with everyone else, and upon entering the GMC Jimmy that was to take them to the studio for the day, he, Matt, Steve and Murph noticed an antique car sitting in the parking lot. It was shaped like a Porsche, slightly rounded on the hood and rear, and it had drop-down head lamps for headlights.  
"Pretty, isn't it?" Danny noticed with a laugh as he slid onto his Harley, picking up his helmet.  
"Whose is that?"  
"That's our choreographer's, Julia's," he answered Willie, putting on his black motorcycle jacket. "you'll meet her soon. She's on the same floor as you guys in the building-the dance studio is right across the hall."  
The band got into the Jimmy with Murph and Alan's eyes still glued to the car, which was a vintage Mazda RX7 with bright red paint and the legendary Wankle rotary engine. A jagged sunshade was on the back and the car was in pristine condition.  
"Wicked, huh?" Lou took a peek as well. "Maybe we can get a ride in it."  
"It'd have to be one at a time. It's a two seater." Tom buckled himself in.  
"Doesn't that have a Wankle engine?"  
"Wankle rotary," Willie corrected Duck. "I think so. I don't understand what it means though!"  
"Wankle rotary means it's a pistonless engine," Alan informed them, having been into the sportscar scene back in the early eighties. He had tried out a number of sportscars but always came back to Mercedes. "they discontinued that engine if I remember right."  
The Jimmy started up and they were on their way.

During midmorning break from practice, the horn players were sitting down and gossiping, their instruments on their laps, when Danny came in. They looked up as he marched into the studio and saw a woman next to him.  
"Gentlemen, I'd like you to meet Julia, our choreographer. Julia, I saw them admiring your car this morning."  
"Oh!" Lou stood up and shook her hand as she was introduced to them all around. "How old is that car?"  
"It's my age, 30 years old." Alan noted the pleasing tone of voice which she spoke with. It was clear and concise, yet almost silvery and playful at the same time. He estimated she would be an alto on the singing scale.  
"Awesome," Tom shook her hand next. "bet it makes one hell of a noise!"  
"Yes it does!" Julia had a warm laugh which made them smile.  
"Hi, I heard you play the trumpet as well." Alan's mind filled with first impressions. Julia was thin, well built, had a muscular form, speaking of her years of dancing. He was a little startled to look into a pair of mesmorizing green eyes and see fatigue in them. It wasn't just fatigue, there was a hint about her that suggested she'd seen more than her share of troubling times. Alan had met a few people like that before and he usually tried to be funny to cheer them up.  
"I do. I have a Yamaha." Julia was taking in her first impression of Alan. He was about five inches taller than her and she was five foot six, he had a ponytail, hazel eyes, and seemed to be an easy laugher. Julia knew of Mr. Fabulous, having listened to his trumpet riffs for years to refine her own technique.  
"Those are good base models. Want to jam sometime?"  
"Sure." she colored a bit at his suggestion and he chuckled. Julia had pale skin, though lightly tanned. Her red hair was pulled back in a medium length braid, and she had a thin yet angular looking face.  
"Was that car handed down to you?" Willie approached, so Danny introduced them.  
"Yeah, my mom willed it to me when she died 5 years ago."  
"Sorry to hear that. Aren't Wankle rotaries pistonless?" Alan tried to bring her mind back to the car as he understood what the weariness in her eyes was related to. Something else was in them though, something that he couldn't put his finger on exactly.  
"Yeah! My mom always called it the poor man's Porsche. The car's been restored with money from the estate, so it's like new. I'll offer you guys a ride one at a time." Julia offered, a gleam of amusement in her eyes.  
"Who gets honors first?"  
"I'm drawing up a sign up sheet, no arguments." Julia sat down at a desk, pulled out a clipboard, pen, paper, and began to draw it up. Alan watched her then grinned at his friends.  
"There we go! Sign on and whoever's coming back to the hotel with me tonight, meet me at the car in the lot." she tacked it up on the bulletin board and looked at her watch. "I gotta choreograph the Lookin' For A Fox dance now, so see ya later."  
"Bye." they watched her leave.

After several hours of practice and rehearsals, Alan felt like his brain had been handed to him. It had been a long day and the musical notations on the sheet music danced in his brain. He knew they would be in his dreams tonight and he would have dreams about the music itself for weeks. Nevertheless, he pressed on.

Packing up his trumpet for the day, he stowed it in an equipment locker he'd been issued, locking it with a standard lock and key. His Bach trumpet meant more to him than a lot of other things and he needed it taken care of.

"So who's on the list for the ride home tonight?" Murph paused as he put his sheet music away.

"Willie gets first crack at it." Steve answered as he went over the list. "I'm tomorrow morning, Murph is tomorrow evening. The next day in the morning is clear. Alan, you want it?"

"Yeah." he signed his name and went out into the hallway. The recording and dance studios were on the ground floor so they could see if the Jimmy was waiting at the entrance to take them back to the hotel. It was mid June and despite the time of year, it was chilly outside so Alan chose to wait inside.

"Aw, let me do it this once!" an unfamiliar male voice sounded from within the dance studio.

"No way, pal!" Alan recognized Julia's voice. "I've showed you how to do it before and you can't master it! Give up!"

"I can't give up!"

"Yes you can, you're a man!" in spite of this, Alan was chuckling. "I'm better than you at it, admit it!"

"Never!" a door opened up and Julia stepped out.

"Get real!" the door snapped shut as Julia pulled out her car key. "Oh, hi, Alan," she walked up to him. "my friend and me in our little arguments."

"What were you arguing about?"

"He can't start a carburetted engine and I can." she smirked.

"There is a trick to it." he'd had only a few experiences with that type of engine.

"Yeah, just pump the gas a few times, turn the key, pump the pedal a few more times and adjust the choke so it hits 2,000 revs and shift it to first gear. It's a balancing act."

"It is." Alan agreed as Willie came down. "See ya tomorrow, Julia."

"Bye, Alan." she left with the drummer.

Over the next few days, the band got the numbers down and they were given the go ahead to start recording that Friday. There were a few difficult moments, like when Murph couldn't get a keyboard solo down properly, but he worked through it and it sounded great on playback. Alan adjusted his headphones and watched as Paul Shaffer headed the recording session so they could hear themselves play later on.

"Great job, guys!" Landis told them at supper that Friday night. "We'll be ahead of schedule now. Keep up the good work!"

"Shame that Julia couldn't make it tonight." Danny picked up a Molsen Golden beer and took a swig.

"Where is she?"

"She said she overdid it today and needed some quiet time tonight." Danny answered Tom.

"Not surprising though is it, Danny?" Landis picked up the wine bottle and gave himself a conservative measure. The hotel was across the street from the restaurant so they were not driving anywhere. "I mean it's only been what, a week since she had the baby?"

A few of the bandmembers choked. "Say what?" Matt asked. In similar shock, Alan and Steve both stared at Landis.

"Julia had a kid a week ago," Danny said with measured carelessness. "I thought she'd want more time, but she wanted to get straight back to work."

"I really hesitated on hiring her, but she knows her own limits. By the way, she's fiercely private about that part of her life, so don't mention it to her." the director signaled the waiter. "Our revival meeting scene is being shot on her property."

"Yeah, we've been out there," Danny chirped. "she owns about 6 acres of land, most of it is rented to a local farmer, but she keeps a few animals."

"What kind of animals?"

"She told us that she has the use of a middle aged mare horse named Zelda that belongs to the farmer, Julia also keeps a small flock of chickens, a goat she named Ass, and she has a few betta fish."

"The Siamese fighting fish?" Murph queried. "Neat! Does she breed them?"

"Yes she does. Julia loves them like crazy and they have their own personalities."

Alan tuned out of the conversation at that moment, thinking that was why Julia looked so tired when he'd first met her. The trumpet player wondered why she returned to work so soon after such a grueling time in her life. He wasn't about to ask any questions, but after a friend of his had her daughter, she'd taken 3 months off of work to bond with her child and all that family stuff that children and babies usually entailed.

The supper started and ended with Danny relating anecdotes during his time in Hollywood, all the bandmembers told funny stories, and Landis told what it was like to work with Michael Jackson.

When they returned to the hotel, Alan saw Julia going from the lobby to her room as well, so he caught up with her and asked her how she was.

"Oh, hi, Alan. I'm just exhausted really," she unlocked the door. "I shouldn't have overdone it today. My friend, he's a freaking overzealous weirdo and doesn't know when to stop."

"He's younger than you, isn't he?"

"Yeah, he is. I'm fine with 8 hour days choreographing, then he wants to do really physical stuff when I'm beat." the lock clicked open and she turned the knob.

"I won't keep ya if you're that tired," he gave her a smile. "I've got to call my girlfriend anyway."

"Oh, you have a girlfriend?" she smiled. "Good for you."

"Thanks. Do you have anyone?"

"No. I just don't want the drama that comes along with it. I prefer to call myself asexual."

Alan looked impressed with her fortitude and unwillingness to be taken for a ride by some callous man. Julia clearly stood up for what she believed in and she refused to compromise. A woman like her should be snapped up by a loving and caring man, he thought. Clearly there was a shortage and by Julia's personality, she might have unintentionally scared them away by her dominant attitude.

"I'll see you tomorrow, Julia."

"Tomorrow's Saturday," she reminded him. "I'm going back to my house to take care of my animals."

"How long is it from here?"

"About an hour. It's in a really rural area. I'll be back on Monday."

"Right. Goodnight."

"Goodnight, Alan." they went into their rooms and shut the doors.

Alan's ride with Julia a few days ago had been a lot of fun for them. He had admired her knack for getting the engine started and she had a flawless technique for driving stick. The trumpet player used to grind the gears unintentionally when he was changing them, but Julia changed gears almost imperceptibly though a simple motion of her arm. He also discovered that Julia had road rage and didn't like to be cut off. At the first chance, she passed by an Accord that cut her off and tried to get her to rear end him. Julia had barked obscenities, passed by the idiot, and Alan flipped off the guy for her. Julia laughably thanked him for it as they pulled up to an MX5 or Mazda Miata. Both drivers shouted how much they liked each other's cars, did a friendly drag race in an old parking lot, and it was a draw.

Alan picked up the phone in the room and began calling Mae while Julia flopped onto her bed and turned the TV off, preferring a book to read instead.

Monday when Julia arrived at the studio with her gear, she heard Alan playing trumpet and jamming with Lou on some riffs. Today was the day that she had brought her own trumpet, though just by carrying the case she thought she would hurt her arm. On her hand were her car keys and water bottle and she had to fight the door open, careful not to knock it with her trumpet case. Her flute was back at her house, as she thought nobody would want to hear her play it.

"Hey Julia!" Matt greeted her. "Today's the day you work with us-excited?"

"Hell yes!" she beamed at him. "Brought my trumpet today, so tell Mr. Fab when he gets a chance, he can poke fun at how badly I play!"

"I bet you play really well. We'll meet you in the afternoon, OK?"

"I'll be here." she retired to her studio and began to warm up for the day.

"OK then, we need to head over to Julia at the dance section of the building," Steve announced around 2 PM, unstrapping his guitar and putting it away. "we'll make sure we do the Blues Brothers right!"

"Go for it!" Landis chimed as he pulled John Goodman and Danny from the recording studio into a meeting.

The dance studio was all hardwood floor, mirrors on one side, a waist-high railing in front of the mirrors, and a small fake stage at the opposite side. Julia had put on some music and was dancing away off in one corner.

"Damn, she's really good." Duck and Willie marveled at her ability. Julia's trumpet case lay on the shelf beside the stereo and she turned in mid dance to see everyone staring at her. She flushed red and paused with a rueful laugh.

"Come on, continue!" they encouraged her.

"Hang on, I've got a song I know you guys have heard before." she clicked the stereo remote and Michael Jackson's Smooth Criminal came on. Julia launched herself into the dance routine that Michael himself used in the official video, faking the long lean towards the end.

Jaws were scraping the floor when she was done. Julia held her last position for a moment, breathing hard, then accepted the applause graciously.

"OK, let's see what we got here," Julia pulled out the sheet music and counted off the measures, ascertaining that Love Light was a typical four measure, medium pace song. "I need you all to position yourselves like you are when you're playing the song."

They did so, each looking at her expectantly. She directed the horn section on what to do, mainly taking 4 steps in one direction forwards and backwards. It was a simple song to choreograph for the bandmembers, though Danny, Joe, John, and Evan it would be more complicated. Julia had some idea of what she wanted to teach them, though it needed a little more refining before she would be done.

She went through Love Light and Funky Nassau with the bandmembers, then towards the end, pulled Lou from the others with a warning that she would be teaching him, John, Evan and Danny tomorrow the song Respect.

"We'll see you then, right?" Lou gave her a smile as he went out with the others to go back to the recording studio. Aretha Franklin was coming into the studio the next day, after that it was Erykah Badu.

"Sure. If you want some dance pointers for the gospel number, just let me know!" she called after them as Alan came up behind her.

"So, want to jam? I've got some time."

"Really?" Julia wound her hair, which had been dangling loosely, into a ponytail.

"Yeah, they're doing Green Onions right now. No horns needed."

"All right then." she crossed to the trumpet case and opened it up as Alan brought his in. Pulling out her Blessing mouthpiece, she fitted it into the proper slot and raised the instrument up as Alan did the same. He let her play a little first to see how well she was.

Julia focused on her instrument and shut out everything else, letting her soul take control and making the trumpet play a jazzy style riff that reflected her mood. When she paused to take a breath, Alan encouraged her, wanting to hear the end of the piece. refocusing and mentally projecting her feelings through the instrument. It was a light and loose piece with some undertones of something deeper, which to her resembled life's highs and lows.

Alan was struck by the intensity, staring at her as she finished. "Did you write that yourself?"

"I didn't write it at all. I just played it on spur of the moment."

"How old are you?"

"I'm 33."

"You're very good."

"Thanks, Alan. Come on, your turn." he raised up his instrument and played a bluesy riff for her.

"Friggin' hell, that was great!"

"Thanks. All set? Together." it was dueling trumpets now as one played, then the other for several minutes.

"Wow!" Julia exhaled. "I haven't done that in awhile." Alan laughed as he put his trumpet away.

"It does wind you if you're not used to it." they sat down on a bench near the door together, Alan waiting for her to regain her breath. "All set?"

"Yeah."

"What's next for you on the movie?"

"I have to train the dancers for Funky Nassau for the next 3 days, then I'm doing the Looking For A Fox for 4 days, pretty much all choreography. Shooting starts in 2 weeks so I want those two numbers under my belt at least. The gospel song will be hard, but I'm gonna love it."

"Great. So when do we meet up for the revival meeting scene?"

"Next month on the first. I have a few guest rooms if you want to put in a request for one." she giggled. "Dan's already requested one. I think he's more interested in my livestock and my 4 wheeler honestly."

"Well, we'll see. When do we meet up?"

"The shooting is right after the fourth of July. I'll be here in the studio on the fifth, so if you want, you can come home with me that day. We'll be there for a week shooting the scenes."

"What do you think of the movie so far?"

"I read the script and I have to admit that I'm not happy with it," she admitted. "If I was a writer, I would do a hell of a better job than Danny did. His scripts have just been subpar ever since Ghostbusters II."

"You think it blows?"

"Yeah. The movie doesn't have any point, no emotion. He's relying too much on the music and that's a huge sin in the movie business. There's just no plot, Cab seems just slapped in, he doesn't add anything fantastic to the movie. The idea of the kid is a really dumb one too. It's just stinks to me. Don't tell Danny I said that. I don't want to hurt him after he's been so great."

"I won't." he promised. Now that Julia had told him how she felt about it, he could see some truth to it as well. The movie really didn't have a concrete plot, no emotion, nothing that really made it a movie. Alan picked up his instrument and bade Julia goodbye, promising to see her on the fifth of July.

JULY 5th

"Well, here we are," Julia pulled into her driveway merrily, shifting the Mazda into neutral and cutting the engine. "welcome to my house."

It was a small clapboard farmhouse with a covered front porch. Several chickens wandered benignly nearby, eating bugs and ticks. A chestnut brown mare tossed her head from where she was in a fenced paddock. A goat bleated nearby as they got out of the car, Alan taking his suitcase from the back.

"Come on, I'll get you put up." Julia unlocked the door and opened it up. Alan saw a plain and modest house, the living room had been done in a very soft yellow with pine furniture, the kitchen and dining room had been painted in light green.

On the second floor, Julia showed Alan his room, which was a very light brown with white paneling around the windows. Alan liked how she kept the rustic country feeling in the room, with a ceramic brightly colored rooster sitting on top of the cherrywood bureau. The furniture was all cherrywood, several framed black and white pictures of farm life around the 1900 era adorned the walls. Near the entranceway a cowboy hat was hung on a peg in the wall. Right above the doorway, a horseshoe had been nailed.

"Nice!" Alan saw a miniature model of a plow with a horse team pulling it complete with farmer walking on behind on a whatnot shelf near the window.

"Thanks. Make yourself at home. I just did a grocery run yesterday so the fridge's stocked."

"Where are you heading?"

"I have to feed my fish."

"Where are they?"

"In my room." she showed him into her room, which was a muted purple color. Julia had a white canopy above her bed, a small 5 gallon aquarium sat on top of her dresser. Alan was able to see a male betta fish in brilliant white with spiny looking fins. A few fake plants sat in the tank while a sculpture of ancient Roman ruins sat in the center, providing plenty of hiding spaces for the fish. Julia tapped on the glass and a fish lazily swam over.

"This is Triton, a crowntail male."

"He's great looking. Who's that?"

"One of his harem," a bright pink female with red fins drifted over. "Dixie. The name just came to me one day."

"She's pretty." Alan commented as the female swam over to peer at him critically through the glass. "Not timid at all."

"The females are friendlier than the males." two more females, one a dark blue and another one in neon green, came over to check him out. They came right up to his finger tap while the male, Triton, swam away, startled. The fish went into the ruins and peered out indignantly at Alan for a moment.

"You aren't kidding," Alan peered over the lid of the fish tank as Julia fed them. The two females came to feed lazily while the male watched them. After the females had their fill, Julia put more food in and Triton swam over to get his share. "he lets the ladies eat first?"

"Yup. Pimp Daddy here likes to look after his girls." Alan chortled as Julia capped the container and set it down on the side of the bureau. "These guys have had two litters so far and the male is a freakin' stud."

"Goes on for hours?"

"And then some. Many's the night I've woken up by their fucking." Julia stepped to her closet and opened up the doors. Alan looked around her room, liking what he saw.

"Nice room." he commented. Julia had a big white desk in front of a bay window that overlooked the front yard, she even had a little balcony which opened by a sliding glass door. Outside there were two pots of geraniums and a lounge chair. Julia had put white gauzy curtains over the glass for privacy.

Julia's room was painted in light purple, the trim was white. Alan noticed a purple flower painted into the corners of the closet door molding and asked her if she stenciled them in.

"No, I did those freehand," she pulled out a purple chamois shirt and put it on, knotting it over her old ratty beige t-shirt. "hell of a time trying to get those petals all symmetrical but it was worth it."

"I bet." her bed was a simple twin bed with a white duvet spread over it. Everything in her room was simple and warm, it had a charm all of its own to him. Alan watched as Julia shut the closet doors and checked the mirror on the wall on the opposite side of the bed.

"Did you do this?" he came upon a painting done in acrylic colors of two betta fish. One had brilliant red coloring and the fins extended to about halfway over his back. The second was more subdued, done in lines of dark blue to lighter medium blue.

Julia picked up a pair of work gloves from her night table and stood next to Alan. "Yes I did." He saw a JH in the lower right hand corner along with a date, indicating she had done the painting about 3 months ago. "Well, my friend and I are going out to do some 4 wheeling in the woods. You can come along if you don't mind getting dirty. I have a spare helmet in here somewhere."

"That's OK. Mind if I walk around a bit to see the land here?"

"Sure," Julia walked with him to the landing and she went downstairs first. "there's a 4 wheeler path that goes around the entire property. Stick to that and you won't get lost."

"Anything else?"

"Ass the goat will follow you everywhere you go, he's like a dog. If you're not comfortable with him, I can put him in the barn."

"I don't mind."

Julia put the gloves on the table in the hallway. "I'm always forgetting where I leave these. Zelda the horse is middle aged and she's really quiet. You can pat her if you like, give her a few tidbits in the bin outside her paddock."

"How old is she?" they opened up the door and walked outside into the brilliant sunlight. Julia crossed to a storage shed and picked up a blue helmet, then took a set of keys off a nearby peg. Alan saw a Honda 4 wheeler that looked ancient compared to the newer ones that he'd seen around.

"Zelda? About 14 years old."

"How far do you go?"

"About 4 miles, all told. My friend Mick and I cross over a dam, salt flats, we get nice and muddy. It's a great stress reliever." she grinned as she mounted the bike.

"I bet it is. I'll be here when you get back."

Julia smiled at him as she put on the helmet and inserted the key into the ignition. "Danny will be up pretty soon. I'll see you both in a couple of hours." straddling the 4 wheeler, she kickstarted it and it revved up. Putting it into first gear, she went out of the shed and began to follow the trail, upshifting it into second and third gear.

Alan took a walk, meandering around the property where a large white Saanen goat named Ass followed him around benignly, giving him an occasional nudge playfully. The trumpet player saw the mare, Zelda, gambolling around in her paddock. He found the feed bin Julia had mentioned and opened it up. The mare, very familiar with the sound the bin made, came trotting over to inspect the newcomer.

"Hey," Alan greeted the horse. She nudged his hand and gave a little neigh. In the bin were a few cubes of alfalfa, some ripe apples and carrots. Julia kept a knife in a side compartment to cut them up, so Alan did that now, cutting up a carrot into wide chunks. He extended his hand widely so she wouldn't nip at his fingers, holding it out for her.

Zelda was a trusting horse, evidence she had never been mishandled all her life. The Morgan mare eyeballed Alan for a moment, decided he was friend rather than foe, and took the carrot he offered her.

****  
When he was done circumnavigating the route around the yard, Alan sat down in Julia's living room, admiring it again. A laptop sat nearby on an end table, charging, the phone from a cordless dock was lying on the coffee table, several People magazines were strewn on it at random, along with a gun magazine.

His eyes roamed over the motley assembly of magazines and was about to pick up a book full of trumpet sheet music when a nondescript blue notebook fell out from under the pile of periodicals. He should have returned it to its place, but spying a number in the upper right hand corner, he was curious to read it. Maybe Julia had been composing her own music in her spare time, so he opened it.

"Has she been composing her own pieces?" he mused as he opened up the notebook. Ass the goat bleated nearby in the paddock with Zelda, but Alan paid no attention to the livestock. The first thing he saw was a date of about 9 months ago. Intrigued, he began to decipher Julia's scrawled handwriting.

"Should I do this?" Alan was interested at once. "I don't like responding to peer pressure-yes, even as an adult you get it!-but I don't want to deny myself the chance to feel like a true lady. It's a loaded question and I have to consider it extremely carefully. If I do it, I could finally do something noble and unselfish for once in my life. There is the chance that if I do it, my disease can act up and I'll be spending time in the hospital for it."

"Her disease?" he asked himself, wondering what it was. Julia wasn't a selfish individual at all, he thought. What was she on about? What disease did she have? So many questions now and Alan did not want to pry, but it was already a bit late on that front, having taken a peek at her journal.

Flipping to the next page, he saw an entry dated a month later. "I've gone and done it and I feel so ill now. My body's in total revolt and strangely enough, I don't feel guilty about what I did at all. The doctor's going to hospitalize me for a few days to stabilize me, then I will be back."

Why was he reading this? Alan snapped shut the journal and replaced it where it had been hidden. His mind was teeming with questions he didn't dare ask. Julia had already been so lovely towards him and he betrayed her trust already by finding a journal and reading a snatch of it. Maybe Danny would know, as he seemed to know her better than many other people.

Right on cue, Alan heard Danny's Harley roaring into the driveway. Standing up, he greeted his old friend from the screen door. Danny pulled off his helmet and cheerfully greeted the trumpet player. The actor peeled off his motorcycle jacket and unlatched his saddle bags from the rear of the bike as the goat nearby bleated and began to gambol around the paddock, trying to get the mare excited so she would play with him.

"Oh, bad luck!" Danny remarked as Zelda grazed calmly and gave the goat an admonishing look. Ass got the message and took a drink from the trough, then sat down in the shade, throwing the horse a sulky look.

"What's up, Danny?"

"Not much," the actor studied Alan. "you look preoccupied. What's going on with you?"

"I found a journal of Julia's and I read a few bits of it," he admitted. "I'm confused."

"Let me toss my stuff in my room and I'll join you out here." Danny gestured to a blue hammock on a white stand in the shady side yard that Alan hadn't noticed before. He nodded and went over there while Danny made himself at home.

"That's better!" Danny sat down beside him a few moments later. He picked up a string tied to one of the hammock ropes and pulled on it, making the hammock swing. The string had been tied to a nearby young maple tree so it wouldn't break and the string was loose enough so that nobody would trip over it. "So what do you want to know about her?"

"Is she sick?"

"What do you mean? Like a cold or a virus?"

"I mean one of those diseases that stays."

"Oh, autoimmune. Yeah, Julia's got type 2 diabetes. She takes injections every day and she manages it so well, you'd never notice otherwise."

"Right. I hope she hasn't been in the hospital for it."

"She did a few times. The most recent was sometime this year, I think. Maybe it was last fall. I'm not clear on what happened to her."

"Tell me." Alan swung his leg back and forth outside the hammock to create the swinging motion.

"Apparently she suffered a sudden dip in her insulin levels and went into insulin shock."

"Sounds serious."

"It was. Julia hadn't been taking care of herself very well and needed to be hospitalized to get her levels stabilized. She was there for 3 days but they let her go after that. She's been great ever since."

"I'm glad of that fact but I got an impression from the journal I found-"

"That's in the past," Danny interrupted. "Julia isn't a bad person, she hasn't flown with the wild crowd."

"Well, I just want to know more about her, that's all."

"Ask her yourself then," Danny suggested politely. "we are at her house, what kind of insight can you gain from it? The animals are well cared for, she has an active social life, her preferred method of fun is mudding with her friend Mick."

"Mudding?"

"You'll see." they gossiped for awhile longer until they heard two 4 wheelers among the trees coming closer. Julia was in the lead and a white helmeted man trailed her by a few feet in an old Kawasaki. "See?" Alan peered closer and saw the two were liberally splattered with mud.

"Good god!" Danny laughed at his friend's reaction as the two people pulled up and cut the engines. He got out of the hammock and went to greet them. After a moment, Alan followed.

"Hey girl!"

"Hey, Danny! You remember Mick." Mick was as tall as Danny but very slender. Mick sported a doorknocker mustache and had wavy blonde hair with blue eyes. Danny shook hands with Mick, beaming at the younger man as Alan nodded a polite hello. Zelda snorted in the background, causing them to jump and Julia had to smile.

"Sure I do. Good to see you again. Where have you guys been this time?" Mick loved to trailblaze with Julia, Danny remembered. The last time he had met Mick they were coming back from a dam built by beavers. For fun, the two had yanked the beaver dam down with their 4 wheelers, prompting the previously dry stream to flood up for days.

"We went to Bear swamp." Julia pulled off her helmet, revealing her mud splattered face. "Mick got stuck again so I had to tow him out." she displayed dripping chains attached to the front towbar of the Kawasaki, disconnecting them and tossing them out in the sun to dry off.

Julia introduced Mick to Alan, then the former said that he had to go. "Next time, use your Honda! I told you they don't get stuck so easy!" she scolded him with a big smile.

"No, they just belly up randomly." he shot back. "OK if I bring the Jag over tomorrow to replace that radiator?" Julia gave him a mock swat on the back of the head laughingly, saying she had to be present while he used her power tools, then told him to scram before she set Zelda on him.

When he departed, she turned to her two friends. "He's afraid of horses."

"Oh." Danny had never heard that before. Julia opened up a burlap sack of feed for the horse, taking a measured dose, putting it into a small bucket, and hanging it off the nail near the paddock. Both of the men watched her as she rapped a stick against the gate, which prompted the horse to come over and stick her nose in the bucket. Julia pumped fresh water into the trough, smiling as Ass came over and took a drink. He tried to stick his head into Zelda's feed bucket, but Julia had hung it up too high for him to get to. The goat bleated his disapproval, making the humans laugh at him.

"I'm starved. What time is it?" Julia folded the top of the feed bag down as Alan checked his watch, answering it was 5:30. "Well, let me clean up and I'll start cookin'."

"Nah, let me do it." Danny volunteered. "Alan can help me." he knew the trumpet player didn't mind cooking, in fact he liked to experiment with recipes. Danny liked to cook, saying he was trained by his wife to get as good as she was. Julia opened up the door and set her keys on the peg in the wall.

"Sure?" they stepped into the front hallway where Julia paused to scrape her boots off on the mat. Mud flaked off and landed on the hardwood floor nearby as she peeled off her boots, setting them to dry outside in the late sun.

"Yeah, absolutely." the men agreed, heading off for the kitchen as Julia stripped off her chamois shirt, dumping it into the laundry along with a mental note to presoak it later. She went upstairs, stripping herself down and jumping into the shower, washing her hair twice.

"Oh, that's so much better!" Julia sighed in relief as she pulled on a pair of cotton sleeping shorts printed with anchors and a pink camisole top. The betta fish came out of their hiding holes and watched her as she combed back her hair and tied it in a loose ponytail. Julia paused to look at her fish amid the sound of the aerator humming in the background.

"Let's go see what the men are creating in the kitchen, probably a disaster." she giggled as she left the room, stepping into a pair of flip flops on the way. The hallway was adorned with pictures of her family and as she passed by, she looked at the picture of her two parents. Her father, Herbert, was killed in a construction accident where he worked when she was 25, and her mother Lila had taken off on Julia when she was just 10. Nobody knew what had become of her, and for all her resentment towards her mother, Julia was glad she was gone and not contacted her. She uttered a little sigh and descended the stairs, hearing Alan and Danny mumbling but not hearing the words.

But a disaster would have to wait. The supper was quite good and after Julia returned from giving herself an injection, both of the men had cleaned up and were sitting on the couch in the living room. Danny was channel surfing, Alan was browsing the trumpet magazine he'd found earlier.

The choreographer joined them on the couch, putting on old episodes of The Simpsons and giggling away at the escapades of Homer and Bart. A local channel was playing a marathon, so they all watched until about 10 PM.

"Well gentlemen, I must say goodnight. Don't stay up too late now." she stood up and hid a yawn.

"Goodnight, Julia. I'm sure we'll be up soon." Danny smiled fondly at her as Alan nodded.

"What, he doesn't speak after 10?" Julia teased Alan, turning and going upstairs.

"You wish!" she laughed as she headed for the stairs.

"So what else do you know about Julia?" Alan muted the commercial as Danny stood up and stretched.

"She's a great lady, obviously."

"What about her family?"

"She's an only child, much like her friend Mick, her father died in a construction accident when she was 25, she inherited the house and land. Her mother nobody knows much about."

"What happened to her?"

"From what Julia has told me, her mother just upped and left her when she was 10. Julia was very close to her dad and she never forgave her mom for walking out on them."

"How did she meet Mick?" the lanky man Alan had met that day lingered in his mind, wondering if there was something more between Mick and Julia than met the eyes.

"Julia's dad worked for Mick's dad, a construction foreman. Name's Reggie Sanderson."

"Oh. Have you met him?"

"Once. On Julia's recommendation, we hired him to help us set up the revival meeting tent and all that stuff. Reggie told me that he's tried to look after Julia since he feels responsible for her dad's death. It was an accident and he knows Julia doesn't blame him, but still."

"Does he get updates through Mick?" Alan stood up and both men walked towards the stairs.

"Mostly, yes. Julia also looks out for Mick. The kid's not fully mature as an adult yet and she gently curbs him when she thinks he's being too impulsive."

"Interesting."

"Yeah. Mick looks a lot like his dad. You'll meet them tomorrow when they come down to set up the revival tent."

"I can't wait to see this." Alan remarked as he opened up the door to the room Julia had assigned to him earlier that day. "Goodnight, Danny."

"Night, Alan." they went into their rooms, Danny closing his door and Alan left his ajar. He drew the blinds, got ready for bed, read for a few moments, then turned out the light. Danny had a somewhat more difficult time trying to sleep, so he sat in bed, turned out the lights, then positioned himself at the bay window where he could look out over the paddock.

Julia had not put the mare or the goat in the barn for the night, as it was warm and she knew both of the animals were happier out of the barn than in it. They had plenty of water to last the night and they were already fed. Danny saw the silhouette of Zelda as she sedately walked around the paddock while Ass stretched out in a corner, snoring gently. Nearby, the chickens were tended to and most were dozing off in the warm dirt near their pen.

The actor remembered meeting Reggie and Mick a few weeks ago when they'd come to discuss specifics of the tent installation and subsequent work. Reggie was as tall as Mick, favored a brown goatee flecked with gray, and was equally as thin as his son. Mick had been helping Julia take apart her Honda 4 wheeler to change the oil in it when Reggie sidled up to Danny.

"I love your movies," Reggie admitted. "Tommy Boy was hilarious."

"Thanks." Danny grinned. "So how long have you known Julia?"

"Almost 7 years now, her dad worked for me." Reggie took off his Cabela's hat and wiped his brow, replacing the hat as he watched his son and Julia tinker with the 4 wheeler. "These two met at a company picnic and became fast friends."

"How old is your son?"

"About 19, almost 20, I think," Reggie shook his head. "time kinda sneaks up on me."

"Amen to that one." Danny agreed. "I can hardly believe that my daughters are almost grown up."

Reggie looked at Julia with a wistful look as she selected a wrench and began to loosen up a bolt. "Her dad was one of the best men on the firm. Really detail-oriented, always gave it his best. She's so much like him."

"Is she?"

"Very much," Reggie looked at Danny, silently beseeching him to not mention what he was about to say to Julia. "I had a meeting that day when her father was killed otherwise it might not have happened at all."

"Don't go there," Danny scolded. "there's few things in life worse than second-guessing."

"Sometimes I do think about it, but I'm doing my best for her," Reggie admitted as Mick burst out laughing at a joke Julia had just told him. "I'm glad she and my son are such friends. There's a lot of her dad in her mannerisms. Mick used to be a real hothead, but her influence just calmed him right down over time."

"I'm glad to hear that," Danny replied. "she seems like a good influence on him."

"She really is. Mick likes to tease her that she's in league with his mother and me and we're all conspiring against him, but he's a teenager still and they all say that. It's one thing the way his mother and I talk to him because we're his parents, but when Julia tells him the same thing that we do, he tends to take it more seriously."

"Third party views are invaluable," the actor agreed solemnly. "that's some of the most honest feedback a person can get."

"And how." they watched in silence for a few moments as Mick slid the oil pan out from under the Honda as Julia plugged the hole back up, unscrewed the oil reservoir from the top of the engine, and dumped synthetic oil into it. Checking the dipstick a few times, she nodded in approval, screwing the cap back on.

"Get it all figured out yet, Mick?" Reggie walked over with Danny as Julia put the dirty oil into the old container, labeled it RECYCLING, and put it on the back of the 4 wheeler.

"Yeah, Dad," Mick chirped. "want to take it for a test drive so it meets your approval?"

"Sure. All right with you, Julia?"

She smiled and backed away a few feet. "Key's in it, Reg. Go for it!" Danny got the impression that Reggie was thinking her father was proud of her. He straddled the bike, used the kick start, and it fired right up.

Yawning, Danny finally relaxed enough and began to fall asleep.

At 8 AM the next morning, Julia woke up and prepared herself for the day. She didn't like taking showers in the morning, she preferred the evening when she was filthy from the day's activities. Mick was bringing his pride and joy, a Jaguar X type sedan as he needed to replace a radiator and since Mick was not very mechanically able, Julia was going to direct him on how to do it properly.

Knowing how Mick liked to make a mess, Julia put on her oldest holey jeans, ratty old sneakers, and a faded blue t-shirt. The outfit had stains of oil from past oil changes, a streak of silver colored Bondo that no amount of soaking could get off, and a few slivers of fiberglass and resin from a patching job. Julia tied her shoelaces, then picked up the betta food can.

The dancer had trained her females to eat off of her hand, but Triton didn't do it. Julia wet her index finger, dipped it into the fish flakes, then put it into the tank. The two females crowded around her finger, each nibbling some of the flakes off, making Julia feel like she'd been tickled. Giggling, she tossed a few flakes at the direction of Triton, who ate them while giving Julia a dirty look, like how dare she demean his females by having them eating off her finger! She was used to it by now and just laughed at him.

Clattering downstairs, Julia discovered that Danny and Alan were having a lie-in that day, so she had her breakfast and went outside to feed the mare.

Alan woke up hearing her whistle for Zelda. He sat up and leaned over to look out the window, seeing Julia opening up the feed sack and measuring out a dose for the horse like she did last night. Zelda nudged her arm playfully, prompting Julia to laugh and rub her long forehead right down the middle. The mare ignored her food as Julia rubbed her some more, reaching a point where the horse sank down onto the ground and staring at Julia, inviting her to rub her all over.

"Oh, fine!" he opened the window to hear her say that. Alan chuckled, seeing Julia work her small hands over Zelda's mass.

Danny rapped on Alan's door, who bade him enter. "You just wake up?"

"Yeah." the actor's hair was wet from the shower. "Look what she's doing down there."

"Horse massage, right? She spoils that horse." he laughed to see Julia working her way towards the horse's flanks. "Well, we better get up. Landis will be here soon and Reggie with Mick."

"Right."

One hour later, a green Toyota Tundra was in the driveway and a man entered the house, tall and rail thin, followed by Mick. Alan was sure that was Reggie, and he saw the resemblence between the two right away. Mick's eyes were blue and Reggie's were green, Reggie's hair was a sandy light brown and Mick's was deep brown.

"Heya!" Julia entered the foyer, hanging up her brown work gloves. "Alan, meet Reggie."

"Nice to meet ya." Reggie had a wide smile and the two amicably clasped hands in a firm shake.

"Back at ya. So where's the site for the revival meeting?"

"I have just the spot. Mick and I will lead on my 4 wheeler, you guys can follow us." the men followed suit, Landis in the truck cab with Reggie while Alan and Danny rode in the truck bed out to about an eighth of a mile. The men talked about setting up the location, running lines for support, and other things while Julia and Mick sat under the shade of several maple trees and gossiped.

"So I'll bring over the equipment this afternoon and get it started up then?" Reggie climbed back into his truck.

"Yes indeed. I'll cut you a check to cover everything and you'll get a special thanks in the credits." Landis promised.

"Is it time to wrap it up?" Julia glanced at her watch, realizing they had been out there for almost 2 hours. Mick stood up and gave her a hand, both clambered onto her Honda and led the men back to the front of the farmhouse. The Jaguar sat in the side yard near a bigger shed which Alan guessed housed all sorts of power tools.

"So Mick, wanna stay for lunch? You too, Reg." she stood on the porch. "We can order in from Dante's."

An agreement was reached surprisingly quickly, and they sent out for pizza. Mick and Julia set up a picnic table near the paddock and they ate out there, enjoying the summer breeze. Ass had been shut up in the paddock with Zelda and the chickens clucked and wandered aimlessly nearby. Mick teased one with a crumb and the hen got frustrated, squawking loudly.

"Mick!" Julia squirted him with a plastic bottle. "I told you not to tease them! They get frustrated, they don't lay eggs, I can't sell!"

"Oh come on, it's funny!" Mick protested.

"No, bad Mick!" she spritzed him again. "Keep this up and I'm shutting you into the barn with Zelda!" Danny and Alan sniggered while Landis laughed.

"Dad!" Mick whined. "Save your son here!"

"Sorry, kid. I have no say here. It's her way or the highway." Reggie hauled off his can of Pepsi and belched loudly.

Julia thought for a minute and since they were done eating, she went over and picked up the chicken Mick was so intent on tormenting. "This hen has a bad attitude and she bites. Wanna keep making fun of her? I'll sneak over to your house and hide her in your bed so she can bite your nads off."

"Your mother and I will help her!" Reggie proclaimed as Mick recoiled from the bad tempered hen in Julia's hands. The rest of the men laughed at Mick's discomfort kindly as Julia put the fowl down, watching her run off, squawking and clucking madly.

That afternoon, Landis, Alan, Reggie, and Danny, accompanied by two other people from Reggie's construction firm began erecting the revival tent. Julia and Mick stood outside her shed as they talked tools and he brought out the newly purchased radiator.

"Very shiny!" the radiator was in chrome and it gave off a glare. "First things first, back up the car, I'll hook up the air compressor."

With the aide of her power tools, Julia patiently directed Mick on draining the radiator of the coolant, taking the old cracked radiator completely off the car and tossing it aside onto the greasy old blue tarp Julia kept. Reggie would come by later and cart off the old ruined radiator, disposing of it properly.

"Tighten that washer...good!" Julia beamed at her friend as he set the last bolt in place. "This time, take those corners slowly!"

Mick just smiled like he'd been complimented. The teen was an aggressive driver and not adverse to yelling at others while on the road. Julia had spent a few white-knuckled drives with him as he showed off his driving skills. He was a good driver, but he scared Julia without meaning to several times. She had been in bad accidents while he had never, she supposed she had a little post-traumatic stress disorder from the ordeals.

Julia would have discussed his driving skills in more detail, but what was the point? He was still immature mentally, he would just brush it off like there was nothing to get worked up over. Maybe there wasn't since he hadn't been in any accidents, though that track record might be broken at some point.

"For god's sake, get an inspection sticker!" she nagged, indicating it was due over two months ago. "You know the cops'll make you pay a fine or impound the car!"

"Wah wah wah," the teenager mocked. "come on, let's have some fun!"

"Yeah, let's go ride Zelda!" she put her tools away and locked up the shed.

"I was thinking go and get my girlfriend. Wanna come?" Mick opened up the door to the Jag and stepped in, pausing to turn around and look at his friend.

"Nah, I'm gonna go riding."

Mick shrugged. "See ya later than."

"See ya. Tell Janet I said hi."

"Will do!" he drove off as Julia went into the barn and picked up a saddle.

Zelda was more than happy to go riding with her as she knew. The dancer led the horse along a shady path among the woods that would take them to the revival tent being put up. Among the foliage, she thought of the past times her father would take her walking or when he was teaching her to ride horseback. Her dad had been her best friend and she could confide in him anything.

She had been working as a dance teacher when she heard the news her father had been in a construction accident and rushed to the hospital, but by that time it had been too late. Julia blinked back tears as she remembered the confusion of the hospital, nobody knew anything, until Reggie had burst through the doors and talked to a doctor.

"Come on, Zelly." the horse went into a trot. Reggie had been her advocate during that dark time and she was forever grateful to him. He had come by to check on her once daily and to go over paperwork that needed to be done. Even before her dad died, Reggie had treated her like an adult, never talking down to her or admonishing her. As time had gone on, Julia had attended counseling to get her life back together and spent more time traveling, freelancing for movies that required dance.

Mick had told her 6 months ago that his dad was worried that she was traveling so much to forget her past memories of grief, as her home was the one her dad had lived in, but Julia reassured him that it wasn't so. Neither one of them knew that she had a child, as she kept that a very closely guarded secret.

Arriving at the site, she halted the horse and saw the tent was already up, fake floor for the dancers to dance on had just been laid, and the men were setting out chairs. Reggie was busy setting up a collapsible stage for the choir, two podiums were set up as well.

"Hey, Julia!" Danny waved to her as he took a chair out of Reggie's truck. "Riding Zelda, I see!"

"Indeed I am. She hasn't been ridden all week!" she brought the horse closer to him. There were no loud mechanical noises, so the horse was comfortable being around the humans as they worked. "The dancers will be here tomorrow so I can give them a final going over in rehearsal and then we start shooting."

"That's on the agenda," Danny patted the horse. "you feel OK, Julia? You look a little pale."

"I do? It's nothing. I was just remembering my dad. He taught me to ride."

"I hope you remember the good times." he looked concerned.

"I do. I have to work to push the bad memories out. I want good times only." she admitted as Landis and Alan came out of the tent.

"That's the way to go." Danny's smile warmed her. "Where's Mick?"

"He went to go and get his girlfriend. I like her, but I don't want to be the third wheel with them."

"Does she like you?"

"Yeah, we get along. I want them to get some time alone together and I really don't feel like playing the third wheel like I said."

"I understand you don't want to be around romance like that if you're not directly benefitting it."

"Yeah." she nodded. "So what's going on here?"

That night, Alan sat out on the porch swing in the low light of the moon, swinging gently as he watched Zelda caper around with Ass. The horse had shed the dignified look of the past evening, playing chasing games with the goat. He smirked to see them gambolling around like a pair of much younger animals. Danny had already gone to bed, Julia was nowhere to be seen, which worried him some.

"Alan?" her voice penetrated the darkness as she became gradually visible, silhouetted in the light. "What are you still doing up?"

"What time is it?" she snorted as she crossed over to him and sat down on the swing.

"You're wearing a watch, tell me."

"Holy shit, it's almost midnight."

"Wiseass," Julia muttered, prompting him to ask her if she was all right. "I'm OK, just tired and a bit keyed up for tomorrow. My dad died around this time years ago and I muddle through."

"I heard a little about that. Danny told me some. How did he die?"

"A bulldozer pinned him down and mangled his limbs, Reggie told me."

"Reggie's a nice guy."

"He is. Reggie stood for me when I couldn't do jack shit. We worked on the funeral together, all of that, and asked me to stay with him, Mick, and his wife Suzie for about a week."

"Did he?"

"Yeah, but I refused. I didn't want to impede on their family so he kept checking on me every few days. Reggie looks after me, I'm sure you noticed, for which I am grateful. He's like a second dad to me and I know my dad would have approved." her voice was a little choked up and Alan eased an arm around her. She leaned into him, comforted by the gesture.

"I'm sure your dad was a fine man." his words sounded lame to him, but they had the desired effect. "Do you think you can sleep now or do you want to stay up longer?"

"I'm gonna try to sleep." Julia sat up and they entered the house. "Thanks, Alan."

"You're welcome. Goodnight." she wished him the same and they went to bed.

Call time was 5 AM the next morning so they didn't waste the sunlight, and the entire band plus dancers and extras were assembled on the lawn near the tent. Cars and trucks were lined up on the grass plus two busses. Julia parked her 4 wheeler behind a nearby tree, wound a chain around the trunk, laced it around the vehicle and locked it, not taking any chances. Reggie, Mick, Suzie, and Mick's girlfriend Janet had been invited to be extras in the scene, a chance they would not turn down. The women were in bright colors, the men in suits, flags and banners were hanging from the ceiling of the tent.

"OK, one more practice of the dance from the top!" there was an outdoor stage set up so they could run through the number. Julia led them through it one final time, making sure everyone got it right, and deemed it perfect. She wasn't in the number, though she would be keeping an eye on everyone.

"Excellent, Julia!" Landis applauded. "OK, ready to film!" the dancers and extras assembled as the band stood by the paved road, ready to start walking.

The filming took the rest of the day. Mercifully, the outdoor scenes were shot in good time before the sun moved so continuity wasn't an issue. Inside the tent, there were several takes, camera adjusting, touch up of makeup, etc. Julia had to giggle to herself about the band's idea of dancing, as she saw Tom Malone doing something with his hands, Alan did something unrecognizable, and the others looked to her like they had inner ear problems. In the middle of the dance, Elwood, Mack, and Buster came into the center of the tent and did a dance themselves, making Julia happy that they did it flawlessly.

Landis had budgeted on needing the tent location for a week, but they were done in 3 days. Being ahead of schedule was unusual, but Landis asked Julia if there was any secluded area on the property where they could film the scene where the Bluesmobile runs out of gas.

"Sure, right here." she showed him a wooded area next to the road where he could stick up a fake sign indicating where they were in the movie. There was a small clearing nearby where Buster could talk to Elwood, so Landis was happy about it. He set the shooting for 9 AM the next morning and Julia didn't need to be present as there was no dancing involved in it. She still promised to show up, riding Zelda.

The next day she showed up as promised, riding the mare as they were finishing up shooting for that day. Danny had to get back to Chicago that night to shoot a few scenes on the road and a few at the nudie bar, so he promised to meet up with Julia when she came back to train the dancers for Cheaper to Keep Her and Lookin' For A Fox.

Alan chose to stay that night with Julia in her house as the rest left. He would carpool with her tomorrow back to the hotel and get back into the studio to finish mixing the soundtrack.

That night after Julia had gone to bed, Alan paused at her father's picture on the wall. Her face was a lot like his, she had his hair, and according to Reggie, much of her father's temperament. A light was still on in her rooom and he entered, pausing to peer into the fish tank. Triton swam over to greet him lazily as his two females-his harem as Julia called it, chased him as he walked past.

Julia had fallen asleep with the light on, a book had fallen over the bed onto the floor. The trumpet player removed the book to her nightstand and pulled up the covers to her elbow. He gazed at her for a long moment, wondering when was the last time she had someone so near her as she slept. He had his girlfriend and he felt protective of her when she was asleep, and he was surprised to feel the same way when he was with Julia.

It was probably because she had nobody. The more he got to know her, the more he liked her. She had been through tough times and that raised his opinion of her, though he thought of her as a good horn player too. Alan was too tired to puzzle things out in his mind, so he simply reached over and turned off the light.

The following week after shooting at her property, Julia was back at the hotel with the band and assorted cast, working with the professional lady dancers in choreographing a routine. She didn't have much experience with burlesque-style dances so two of the dancers gave her some pointers.

Reggie and Mick had come down to construct the stripper bar set while the band put the finishing touches on the album, Danny and John were filming the scene where they tie up the Russian gangsters in the alley. Julia drilled the dancers a few more times, pronounced the routine was very good, and allowed them to go and choose the costumes they would be wearing.

"Gonna have some fun with this, Julia?" Mick asked as he picked up some empty liquor bottles and started filling them with water. She handed him some so he could cap them off and line the shelves behind them with the bottles to make it look more realistic.

"I'm always having fun, trust me on that one." she teased. "I've got my part done in this seedy strip joint set and the girls look great when they dance my routine."

"True." Mick allowed. "What are you doing after?"

"Not much. There's one week here of shooting, they're doing the recruiting band sequences during the day tomorrow and the next."

"You aren't needed for those scenes, so what will you be doing?"

"Haven't got a damn clue," Julia admitted. "I think I've got other work lined up for dancing. Oh, Alan and I want to record a jam session tomorrow after his scene is done."

"Hey you two!" Reggie came over with his saw. "Help me out in here, OK?"

"Oh, fine." Julia smiled as she helped him mark some boards and cut them properly. Armed with glossy paint, she began attacking the runway sides while Mick spray painted the poles gold.

The next day, Julia got up and met Alan at the recording studio like they had promised, at about 11 AM. They had just finished filming his brief scene at the cemetery, and the next time they would need him was when they were leaving the hotel, which was taking place at a nearby hotel at 9 AM the next morning.

Alan looked up from his instrument and smiled, seeing Julia with hers approaching him. The two put on headphones as the sound technician adjusted the levels and began recording them. Julia started off almost inquisitively, teasingly provoking Alan, which he responded to. The two went back and forth for almost an hour until they got tired.

"Wow," Julia pulled her headphones off. "I keep forgetting I'm up against a trumpet champion. How you never won a Grammy award yet is beyond me." she mopped her brow, getting sweaty from the heat outside and the concentration it required to keep up with him.

"Thanks. You're really great as well, I hope you know that." he took off his headphones and put them away, opening up the sound booth door and gesturing for her to exit before him like a gentleman. "I've never seen an amateur with chops like yours."

Julia put her instrument away, sprawling on the couch next to her friend. "I performed with the high school band, did a few musicals in my senior and junior years, but that was all."

"You never pursued it?"

"It's a very hard field to get into. I opted for my second passion which was dance and I seem to be doing all right." she replied, tipping her head back on the couch and gazing up at the ceiling.

"That you are." Alan admired her work done in the revival tent scene and was eager to see what kind of routine she'd trained on the burlesque dancers. Tomorrow afternoon, Julia was going to the Mercedes dealership scene to train Lou, Danny, John, and Evan.

"So want to go grab a bite and then I'll see you later?" she invited him. "I know a good Mom and Pop place down the road."

"Sounds good to me." they left the studio.

That night as Alan was preparing to head back to the hotel, he heard music coming from the dance portion of the building and wondered what Julia was still doing there. It was after 10 and she was usually back to the hotel around 9 so she could rest. Curious, Alan walked over to the dance rehearsal room and peered in.

Julia was there, dancing around to an old song of Michael Jackson's called Human Nature. She was wearing a long skirt that was blue, and her black sport bra top so she could move easier. The trumpet player watched as she danced to the tune, getting lost in it completely. He had never seen her slow dance before and he promptly got lost in watching her. It wasn't a set routine, as she had some stumbles, but he liked what he saw.

When it was over, Alan saw her turn off the stereo and take her CD out, putting it in her dance bag. She walked over to the door where she saw Alan, momentarily freezing in her tracks.

"Hey, Alan," she resumed walking. "what are you still doing here?"

"I heard music and I saw you dancing. I wasn't going to interrupt." he smiled.

"Oh, OK," she wasn't buying that but she didn't pry. "come on, let's get to the hotel in the Wankle car."

"Sure." Alan joined her as she unlocked the car in the side parking lot. The creaky doors swung open with a few whines of protest, but stayed open as they got inside the car and Julia started it up.

"Gotta pump the clutch and the gas first," she muttered as she did so. "Carburetted engines you know. I'm glad fuel injected engines came in when they did."

"This car doesn't have power locks or power steering does it?"

"That's right. Power windows were a novelty back then." the Mazda did indeed have that feature. The car started up and revved as she flipped up the headlamps and turned the lights on.

"Power steering became mandatory didn't it?"

"You know your stuff. Yes it did." she was impressed with his knowledge as she shifted the car into first gear to get out of the parking lot.

"You've been kinda moody today," he had noticed it when she did not come out to chat with the others like she was so fond of doing. "anything up?"

"No, not really." she signaled for a turn. "My dad died on this day 8 years ago now and I always have a hard time with it."

"Do you want to talk to Reggie?"

"No, that'd just make him feel sad and I don't want that. Anyway, I expressed my feeling in dance like I usually do. I don't have anyone's shoulder to cry on, so I did what came naturally to me."

"I'm glad you can cope so well."

"Yup. Later on tonight is when I usually just let it all out." Julia did not elaborate further, not wanting to tell Alan of her sleepless nights on the anniversary of her father's death. She was never able to sleep the entire night, she cried her heart out most of the time, and wrote heartfelt letters to her dad which she kept for year and ritually burned. It was beneficial to write how she felt, but Julia also knew that she needed to let go of the past.

Alan did not know what to say to that so he kept his mouth shut. They spent the rest of the ride in silence and when they entered the hotel, only a goodnight was muttered between them, and they went off to their hotel rooms.

Julia prepared for bed, but had no intention of sleeping. It would be a long day tomorrow but at least she could sleep a little in the morning. The dancer remembered the day when her father died, of Reggie telling her the news, offering to help her, but she'd turned him down. The crushing emotion of what had happened that day flooded her brain, so Julia had rushed out to the car and before she could head off the outburst of crying, it happened.

Not liking being out in public when she was so distressed, Julia managed to compose herself enough to drive home, where she then freely wept for hours. Refusing to answer calls in the proceeding day had sparked worry in Reggie and he had come over to talk to her. At first, she did blame him for the accident, but as soon as she saw him standing on her front stoop, the anger and blame disintegrated from her. Reggie was a compassionate man and he cared for her even before her father died.

She let Reggie into her house, who then began grovelling but she cut him off. Forgiving him when there was nothing to forgive, she had told him. The foreman looked relieved, asking her to help him make plans for her father's burial. Julia did not want to do it, but she had to. When it got to be too much, Reggie would sense it in her mind and offer to take over.

That night, 8 years to the day when her father died, Julia allowed herself to grieve again, feeling like she just lost him yesterday. The dancer flung herself onto the bed, letting herself cry for a few hours. When her head was hurting, she took an aspirin for it and proceeded to write down the letter she composed yearly.

In the hotel, all the bandmembers were asleep except for one. Alan had awakened around 2 and could not get back to sleep, conscious of the fact his friend was in emotional pain and didn't appear to want his help.

Julia woke up around 11 the next day, a lingering tension headache from the night before was pulsing at her temples, but she ignored it and got up, knowing she was needed.

Once she got at the set, Danny could tell that something was wrong with her but he was too tactful to ask. John and Lou noticed it too, though Evan was not as perceptive as the adults were. The choreographer went through the routine she had devised for them, acting as her own happy and perky self.

The men all wondered about her that day, but Julia wasn't about to confide in them her personal problems. She was a professional and did not bring her problems to work. She taught Evan some slick moves to do on the countertop, did a few goofy moves with the men, then stayed until Landis wrapped it up. Julia met Aretha Franklin and trained her backup dancers so they were ready for the dance scene to be shot tomorrow.

Lou reported back to Alan when they were done for the day and had been brought back to the hotel. "It's like all the light has gone out of her, Alan."

The trumpet player did not make any mention of Julia's troubles, sure she would not want him to be telling other people about it. He guessed she needed a few days to recover herself from her grief, pick herself up and move on. He had done about the same when his own father died.

"Let me talk to her." but Julia was not in her room and he couldn't predict where she had gone to.

Choreographing the song Love Light at the battle of the bands in the Louisiana plantation had been a breeze to Julia. The song was relatively simple, the actors caught on right away to her moves, and she trained the horn section in some simple moves that included mainly their feet, as they had to hold onto their instruments. Alan surreptitiously watched her as she laughed and danced with Matt as he improvised a waltz. Danny was grinning widely and snapping pictures left and right.

"Who's next?!" Matt swung her over to Steve who caught her and swept her up in another stumbling waltz. Giggling, Julia looked to the others as they cheered her on to do more complicated turns and fancy moves. She was wearing a long flowing floral patterned skirt with her dancing shoes, and a sport bra top.

"You guys won't be able to keep up!"

"Pose then!" Tom exclaimed. "Show us what you've got!"

"Fine! Steve, hold still." she pulled a simple pose, her left leg extended back, right leg bent as her left hand joined Steve's, holding it at the waist level, while her other hand was up high above her shoulder. "I can't do much as I haven't got a guy to support me."

"Good enough. Show us another one!" Murph chimed. Julia chose Duck, had a few words with him on how to hold her, and then struck a pose. Danny took pictures throughout the dance session, enjoying the clowning around. The band encouraged Julia in dancing so she could show off for them and she happily obliged.

"Think you can teach me to dance?" Julia turned and Alan caught her hand. She measured him up and wryly told him she thought he could be taught. "What are you going to teach me?"

"I think a basic cha cha will go great. Follow me on the rhythm, it's one, two, one-two-three." Julia took his hands and taught him how to move to the beat as Tom and Lou began a simple song to the rhythm.

"Mr. Fabulous is dancing!" Danny took more pictures as the guitar section watched. Alan was the least physically demonstrative on the dance floor. He could move, but he didn't want to most of the time, preferring to concentrate on his trumpet.

Evan was following along and Julia laughed at him in a friendly way as he mimicked Julia's moves. "Not bad, kid! OK Alan, you're going to give me a spin. Gently now." he twirled her and she drew apart from him, arms extended, one hand still in his. "Very nice! You can tell your girlfriend she can take you to dances now."

"Don't let that get out!" Alan laughed as Julia broke the hold. "I'll have to go out and parade around!"

"Touche. For me, the cha cha is a little more complicated." she did a few moves as the break ended and Landis took up his camera again.

Over the next few weeks of filming, Julia was more absent than there, though the dance scenes had all been beautifully choreographed by her and the dancers were trained perfectly. Danny had told the band that Julia had gotten involved with a local theater project and was training young dancers. She had use of the dance studio so when the band were in completing an instrumental, they heard Julia from the across the hall. Steve, Willie, Murph and Tom peered in to see Julia wearing a white tank top and long skirt with her dance heels on, moving towards the line of dancers, correcting posture and giving pointers. She had patience with the young kids and the bandmembers admired her for a long moment before getting back to work.

When filming for the movie had been officially wrapped up, Julia was at the cast party, but kept a low profile. Alan found her sitting at the bar, drinking conservatively. He sat down next to her, noticing she was wearing a black skirt and tights with black dancing heels on. Julia's top was a shiny gold material that shimmered in the light.

"Hey," he signaled for a beer to the barman.

"Hey."

"So got your plans for the summer performance season, or what's left of it?"

"Yeah. I have a production of The King And I to choreograph in the next two weeks."

"Great. Want to come up and visit me sometime?"

"I'd love to," she smiled up at him. "you're a New Yorker, right?"

"Yup. Ever been?"

"Only Syracuse. The rest of the state I could care less." Alan grinned as he sat hauled off his beer. Nearby, Danny and Joe were singing a song as Landis and John were gossiping about the past day's shoot.

"It takes a certain kind of person to tolerate the city."

"The mentally insane. I'm a suburbs kind of girl." she supplied deftly.

"Thanks a lot." he smirked. The two swapped gossip and small talk until it was time to go. Alan hugged her and pecked her on the cheek goodbye, promised to call her when he had time, and very reluctantly left. Julia's face looked a bit sad as she wiped the rim of her beer bottle with her left first finger. Perking herself up with thoughts of the theatrical production ahead of her, she slid off the bar stool and left, her pumps clicking in the distance.

****  
PART 2

Before the movie was set to be released, Alan was roused from his sleep by a phone call at pretty much first light one day. He grumbled as he reached over for the phone extension in the room, keeping his eyes shut and wondering who it was that couldn't wait for a more human hour.

"Yeah?"

"Alan, it's Danny."

"What's the problem?"

"It's Julia." one eye opened up. They'd had infrequent correspondence over the past 6 months and things seemed to be going well for her. It was mid February now and as far as he knew, Julia was still teaching dance and freelancing for movies.

"What happened?"

"Her flight crashed."

"Is she all right?"

"Alan, she's dead." the trumpet player felt like he'd been slugged in the gut and he exhaled sharply.

"When did this happen?"

"About an hour ago. The cops are there and said there were no survivors."

"God..."

"They don't know what happened to the plane that made it crash. It was one of those small Cessnas they use for charter flights."

"Shit," if he had been standing, he would have fallen over. "I talked to her two days ago and she seemed fine."

"She had no idea this was going to happen to her, Alan. Don't take that on yourself."

"When's the funeral for her?"

"Thursday at noon. She'll be interred next to her father. Julia left an advance directive which bequeaths some of her things to you and me." Alan squeezed his eyes shut, not wanting to think about that on top of everything else.

"OK, I'll grab a flight out there."

"Right." they hung and Alan told his girlfriend Mae what he'd been informed of.

"Oh honey, I'm so sorry." Mae hugged him. "Want me to come out with you?"

"No, I should do this alone. She's left some things to me." he put his head in his hands for a moment, then raised his hooded eyes up to look at his girlfriend. "I really liked her."

"I know you did, hon, you're always talking about her." Mae had met Julia once after the dancer had come up to New York to do a Broadway show once. Alan had taken advantage of the chance and had her bring her trumpet and they recorded more riffs together. Mae liked Julia a lot, joking around and laughing, pretending to gang up on Alan from time to time. Julia had only been flown in as a consulting choreographer and the work had only taken 4 days, so she had left for Chicago afterwards.

"I'll get the details set up." Alan got up and began to pack his things.

Alan and Danny, along with Reggie and Mick, showed up among others for the funeral. Mick was somber, in a black suit, and Reggie was actually gray faced with grief. The trumpet player imagined it was a whole lot worse for the foreman, as he had treated Julia like a daughter, looking after her when her father passed. Mick was devoid of his usual jocularity and backslapping good humor.

The procession made its way to the cemetery, where the hole was all ready for them. The pallbearers deposited the casket into the lower part of the vault while the pastor preached. Danny and Alan didn't really hear much of it, but when the mourners went to the reception, the duo stayed behind.

"We have to go to the house. She left us some things."

"Right."

When they reached the house, both looked like they expected Julia to come out the side door and greet them like she had before. The place looked very empty and forlorn without her.

"Where are the animals?"

"The farmer took them back," Danny replied, shutting the car door and pulling out the key the lawyer had given him. "her 4 wheeler went to Mick, her prized Mazda went to Reggie as thanks for everything. Mick took the betta fish as he was the one who got her interested in them in the first place. Mick and Reggie have been cleaning out the place to get it ready to sell."

"I can imagine. What do we get?" Alan tried to banish the memories of Julia coming out the side door to feed the horse she she did every day when he stayed there with her. Danny looked like he was having similar problems as he unlatched the gate into the barren paddock.

"She's left you her trumpet, her paintings, and a few journals. I get her collection of ghost books and a few of her pictures. We can divvy up the pictures, as I know you'd want some."

"All right." all the furniture had been removed from the house already, some of Julia's belongings were in boxes. Alan found 4 paintings, one of which was the betta fish one which he had admired, one was of a dancer in the middle of a dance, one was a horse that resembled Zelda, and the final one riveted his eyes. It was of a sunset, bold brush strokes displayed the sun going down in brilliant orange and black colors. A silhouetted tree and a small flock of birds decorated the background.

Taking up the paintings, Alan turned the sunset painting around and found Julia's writing on the back reading, "Because a glorious sunset one should see at least once in their lives. Julia H, 3/13/1997."

"Alan? You find 'em?" Danny called as he came up the stairs, two photo albums in his hands.

"Yeah, I got 'em." a small box near the paintings was labeled JOURNALS and knew that was for him. He and Danny picked up the box, the paintings, and the trumpet, loaded them into the car, then sat out on the porch swing as they chose the pictures they wanted of their late friend.

"I like that one." Julia was onstage in a long flowing purple dress, made up to the nines for a professional dance competition. Danny took it, finding a few candid shots of her on a hiking trip. Alan chose a picture of Julia riding Zelda, Julia sitting on the porch swing with a big grin on her face.

It took an hour to split up the pictures that they wanted, then after they got into the car to go to the airport, Danny remembered something. "Alan, I've got something for you. I meant to give it to Julia as I just got it back myself. I think you'd like it."

"What is it?"

"A picture." Alan looked around and found a Walmart bag. He pulled out a portrait of himself and Julia when she was teaching him the cha cha that long ago day. Their hands were together, both were facing the camera and both were grinning openly. Forcing back tears, he put the frame in the bag as he thanked his friend.

"It's no comfort, I know..."

"It's OK, Danny. I appreciate it. Any news on the crash?"

"It was a mechanical fault. The black box had some voices on it, apparently one of the engines shorted out or something."

"Damn."

Back home in New York, Alan hung up the paintings around his house, putting the sunset painting in the bedroom. He had no idea what he was going to do with her trumpet, so he decided he would possibly sell it.

"Babe?"

"Yeah, hon?"

"I'm going out to a meeting with my publisher. I'll be back in a few hours." Mae peered into the bedroom to see him putting Julia's trumpet in the closet.

"All right." he nodded as he put the small box of journals on the hopechest at the foot of the bed. Mae left the house, happy to leave him in his thoughts.

Alan sat down on the bed, pulling the journal he'd seen before and read a little bit of towards him. Opening it up, he skimmed the section he'd already read and began on an entry about two months from the first one.

"Man, that was hell," she had written. "my body doesn't like what I'm doing to it and my insulin went down dangerously low. The doctors lectured me on taking better care of myself until the child comes." Alan remembered Landis had told him that Julia indeed did have a child shortly before the movie shooting began. He had wondered if it had been intentional or otherwise, but the next paragraph answered that question. "I do not believe I am risking my life, which other people are insinuating even when they pretend not to. I've done some bad things in my life and my old friends desired a family so badly. Here I am, no family to speak of, and I have a chance to pay back some of the kindness they gave me. If giving my friends a child is what their hearts desire, then that is what I will give them."

"Wow." Alan muttered as he turned the page. The next several months were short snippets, mainly detailing how ill she was, how pleased her friends were with the progress, and finally the day her gift arrived. Julia had not had an easy time, as she wrote she would not be doing it again for at least 3 years. The journal was sketchy, but Alan managed to discern there was a distinct threat of surgery, but in the end it wasn't necessary. Julia's biological child was named Julian in her honor, as it had been a boy. Her friends had taken the child and moved away to Denver, as Julia had proclaimed in her journal that she did not care about the child at all, did not want to see any pictures or hear anything of his progress. In a way, Alan understood that. She had treated the child as if it was an object, something to be tolerated until it was time to say goodbye. Julia had written it was the best way to go since as far as she was concerned, she was just the carrier, not the mother at all.

"It takes a special lady to become a mom," Julia went on, her neat cursive decipherable to Alan's eyes. "having no mother of my own to pattern myself on, I cannot be a good one. Julian will have a doting mom and dad. He has no need to ever know about me. I'm a mom to animals, Zelly and Ass, not to mention my betta fish, and that's good enough for me."

Not every woman could be so complacent in their lives about something like that, Alan realized. Some of Mae's old friends went nuts trying to get what they want before it was too late or before they got too old to bear children. Julia could have taught them a valuable lesson to appreciate what they had. They might already appreciate it, but he thought they needed to appreciate it more and not try to change themselves.

"Damn." too distraught to continue, Alan lay down on his bed as the sun climbed into the sky. It was about noontime and the mid February deep freeze was starting. He had no desire to go outside for any reason, so he stayed where he was, eventually fading into sleep.

Julia's estate was to be sold off, since she had nobody to hand off the property to, and half of the estate would go to Mick for his college tuition, the other half would go to an animal rescue shelter. The Chicago community theater had set up a scholarship fund in her name, Landis was putting a tribute on the movie at the ending, using Danny's copy of the picture he had blown up and framed.

Reggie was happy to get her cherished Mazda, though he admitted he would swap the car if Julia could come back in a second. Up until the crash, Julia had been more like her old self, getting out into the world and getting dance choreography and teaching done for the theaters. She had been the maid of honor in Mick and Janet's wedding, though she absolutely hated the dress that Janet picked out.

Three days passed before Alan picked up the journal again. He turned to the section where Mick and Janet got married, wondering at Julia's reaction to it. She had a clear way of writing to him, it was almost like he was there with her as she was writing her emotions down.

"Today was Mick and Janet's wedding. Man, I was bored! I wish Alan and Danny were here to stir things up some. Reggie and Suzie were so good to me, though. The best man made a cornball toast for them, Mick is such a ham, he always has to be the center of attention. He's still got some maturing to do, though. He's come a long way since I first met him, he was rash, impulsive, very hotheaded and quick to anger. Mick mellowed out to be more like his dad, his mom mellowed out some too, as she was a strict parent. Janet and I would often remark to ourselves that because Mick is an only child he had things handed to him and they're fairly well off. Maybe it's because we're women and we know how to save money, we grow up faster than the men. I didn't have things handed to me and neither did Janet. She has a few stepbrothers and my dad was very strict about me learning the value of the dollar. Mick could just extend a hand and have cash put in it, but Janet and I have been working for our money ever since our dads could assign us chores and we'd do them. Obviously he's graduated school and he works, but he still blows his cash every chance he gets. Janet obsessively saves, which I think will work for them when they're on their own."

Pausing, Alan remembered Reggie had said Julia had been wonderful towards Mick, teaching him to be less impulsive and whatnot. She did have a calming influence on people that she met, as Alan himself felt very comfortable in her presence.

"The wedding went off without a hitch, I had been hired on to do Janet's makeup, I gave the couple dancing lessons beforehand, his mom took the pictures, his dad helped chat up the guests, etc. After I did the makeup I was there as a guest of course, but the social scene surrounding these formal functions I just don't like. Crowds have always been off putting to me and I'm always really uncomfortable. I found myself going outside for a few minutes at a time just to get away from the noise of the DJ and all that. Everybody needs a break, I suppose. Anyway, I fended off a few drunken idiots all keen on dancing with me which was code for a quick feel up, I took the couple to the airport in Mick's Jag I'm keeping for him for the week. He told me to use it as much as I liked; he didn't care at all."

"It's funny, but when I left them at the airport and came home, I felt like I was observing what could have been with my own life. It could have been me getting hitched and taking off for wherever, but it isn't. I have never had a relationship to speak of, as I always maintained that I don't like romance and that kind of thing was below me. Now that I am older, I know it wouldn't have made much of a difference in my life. My dad taught me love of course, though I could never find it for myself. No man could love me in that special way, like Reggie and Suzie, Mick and Janet. I am always the odd woman out. I have never even been kissed."

Was she actually pitying herself? Alan was mystified. "I only have myself to blame. I'm too socially awkward and now I think of it, I do believe that no guy would ever tolerate me. I'm too aggressive and dominant, they like the opposite. I do not believe in love at first sight, I don't believe in the popular myth that everyone has a mate. I am what I am."

"Hon, I'm home." Mae called as she opened up the door. Alan put the journal aside and went to greet her with a fond peck on the cheek. "Reading more of her journals?"

"Yeah. Her friend got married and Julia was speculating on her solitary lifestyle."

"She had a good life Alan, and I don't think she was ready for a man to come in." Mae put her purse away and hung up her car keys.

"You think so?"

"Sure I do. She just wasn't ready for men and all that they entail," his girlfriend smiled. "lucky for you, I always have been."

"Oh, go on!"

"She would have been ready eventually, preparing herself for the right man to come along. She just never got the chance."

"True." Alan remembered that he hadn't been truly ready for it until it happened, something Julia hadn't experienced. "She didn't believe in love at first sight."

"Because she didn't experience it firsthand." Mae sat down on the couch. "So, want to go out tonight? The ice isn't bad."

"Sure." right now he felt like he needed a break from the journals.

****  
A/N: Most of these procedures and tests were done on me, hence Julia's recollections of them.

PART 3

MAY 2009

"Alan, I think it's time for you to go to the doctor. You look like you're losing a lot of weight."

"I'm fine," he protested as he pulled out the box of Julia's journals. "I feel fine."

"A rapid weight loss is always a bad sign." Mae insisted as she got ready for bed. "Remember our friend Robbie? He lost a lot of weight and died of cancer within 6 months. I will not have you going the same way, do you hear?"

Alan just sighed as he replaced a journal with a dark pink cover. Ever since he'd come back from the Blues Brothers tour in Japan, Mae had been on him about his weight loss. He'd looked good externally, he felt good internally, but he had a niggling doubt at the back of his mind.

When he retired for the night, his mind involuntarily crossed over to Julia. How old had she been when she was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes? He could check the journals tomorrow, as he didn't have any meetings during the day.

The years since Julia's death had seen many changes in the country and hardly any of them were good. Alan had been in New York City when the attacks were carried out on the World Trade Center and though everyone he knew was all right, a few of Mae's friends had died. He'd helped her through the grief, mentally praying for strength as the country began to get back up on its feet after the disaster. The space shuttle Columbia had exploded and killed the crew, the economy was in shambles, and everything was in ruins.

Danny was semi retired from acting, on occasion coming out to do some small acting parts but that was about it. He did come out and sing with the band when they were opening a House of Blues. Jim Belushi had come in as Zee Blues sometimes and that was about it.

Mick had emailed Danny and Alan a few times over the years, as he and Janet had two children, one named Chelsea and the other named Julia. The kids were about ten years old now and Julia acted a lot like her namesake, very quiet and smart for her age. Mick wryly remarked that his daughter was born a 50 year old as she acted like one. Chelsea acted like her dad, very active and spontaneous.

Reggie was retired from his construction job and took an active part in keeping Julia's memorial scholarship fund active. Every Memorial day he would plant purple asters on Julia and her father's grave. Mick and Janet agreed that their daughters needed education about remembering those who had gone before, so they took over planting the flowers from Reggie. Alan thought it was a beautiful gesture, though he hadn't been back to Chicago since the funeral.

Matt Murphy had suffered a stroke and in a true show of his tenacious character, he had taught himself to play the guitar left handed now. Alan admired his old friend for persevering and becoming once more able to keep himself making the magic that was his music.

Early on the next day, Mae rose and scheduled an appointment with Alan's internist for that day. She waited for him to get up in a nervous state, unsure of what he would do. Mae had been talking to Julia once about Alan's stubbornness and how to get him to do some things. Julia had once advised her to keep to her guns, match his stubbornness with her own and see who came out on top. The trumpet player knew he was in for a real fight of the wills when she buckled down and wouldn't budge. Nine times out of ten he would give in.

Mae studied the painting of the betta fish their friend had done so many years ago. She'd had the chance to meet Julia when she came up for a few days as a choreography consultant. The two of them had lunch out when Alan was busy, Julia had told her she had taught Alan how to dance, both had traded stories on him and soon they were giggling like crazy. Mae had been invited to see a private showing of the Broadway play and being a theater reviewer for the local paper, she had written a great preview of the play.

The review had cemented Mae's reputation as a reviewer of plays and she was getting more assignments now. Alan remarked that Julia had given Mae the jump start that Mae's career needed and she was very grateful.

Now, Mae waited impatiently with her hands on her hips as Alan got up and stumbled downstairs. He saw her, narrowing his eyes in the morning light and frowned.

"Alan, I've made an appointment for you today with the doctor. You will go or I'm leaving. I can't stay with a person who doesn't fight for his life." she pronounced the ultimatum with a lack of emotion in her voice to make sure he got the point. It killed her to have to pretend to be so coldhearted when she loved him so dearly, but if he wasn't going to get medical help, she wasn't going to stick around to watch him die.

The trumpet player just sighed, ready to acquiesce. "All right. When do we go?"

"In an hour." Mae was the ruler of the house, also the healthcare person for both of them and Alan either had no energy left to challenge her, or he knew better. Either way, he had given in. Mae made sure he had breakfast and brought him out to the Camry she owned, shuttling him to the outpatient doctor's office.

Later on that night, Alan pulled out a dark yellow journal of Julia's, flipping through it idly. The doctor had set up a lot of tests that he wanted Alan to complete and they would start taking place the very next day. He had to have blood tests, something called a KUB scan, and an MRCP.

Mae had been very reassuring to him, which annoyed him a little bit, but mostly he loved her even more. She was his pillar of support and she had gone online to check what the tests were, if he needed to prepare for it, and whatnot. She had rearranged her schedule in order to be with him through every step of the way.

He paged through Julia's journal, noticing it was about dated the fall of 1995. The first sentence peaked his interest greatly. "Something is going wrong in me and I don't know what it is. I'm insanely thirsty all the time, I've lost weight, and I've grown with a huge appetite! I don't know what it is, but I talked to Dad and we're going to an appointment with the doctor in the morning. I don't think this is fatal, but I need to make damn sure I have a name to slap on the whatever it is. I like a mystery but not exactly when it entails my body!"

She was very tenacious, even when her own body was rebelling against her. Alan was nervous about what he was to undergo and he found an entry that detailed what she had to go through for her own diagnosis.

"Well, this is a fine fix!" one entry remarked, the penmanship as straight and true as it ever had been, written with blue felt tip. The felt tip bled through the pages so Julia had only used one side. "I've been at the hospital today as an outpatient mind you, and I've undergone almost every lab test they can think of. The sweat test was really interesting, they had put electrodes on my arm and this neat little watch like thing that went around my wrist which had absorbent paper in it. I guess they take my sweat through the chemicals and test it for the abnormality if there is one. I'm not fond about getting poked for the bloodwork, but as I'm given to understand, blood is the key to homeostasis. Nice word, eh? I learn something new everyday."

At the outpatient x-ray center, Alan was ready and waiting for the technician to come and get him for the x-rays they were about to take. He was sure that nothing was going on with him, though Mae insisted he get a full workup just to be sure. Julia had felt fine in her journals, she'd pointed out, but that hadn't stopped her from getting a proper diagnosis.

"Julia may have felt fine," Mae pointed out. "but that didn't deter her from knowing subconsciously that the weight loss and everything she was feeling internally wasn't normal. Her father helped her through all this when he was able to, just like I'm doing for you. You owe it to yourself to get a clean bill of health or a proper diagnosis."

The trumpet player fell silent, as Mae had the upper hand clearly. He was summoned back to get the x-rays done, then a return to the waiting room to get the MRCP ready. It didn't take very long for him to get ready for it, though he had to suck down a sickly sweet solution to make his gallbladder show up on the scan.

Getting ready for the scan, he was put feet first onto the extending table in the enclosed MRI machine. The technician put cardiac sensors on Alan, enclosed him in a cage that went around his chest so that he would lie perfectly still. Earphones went onto his ears so he could hear the radiologist through the noise of the machine.

What followed then was 45 minutes of instructions of when to breathe and when not to so they could get a good image of his chest. Thankfully he had never known claustrophobia, so the enclosed space did not bother him one bit. In a rueful sort of way, he envisioned himself disintegrating from sight like he was teleporting to another planet.

When the day was done, Mae rewarded him with a supper out on the town before they went home. Alan still felt fine, he was able to be himself and made it clear to Mae how much he appreciated her. he still thought that he was fine, but he appreciated her concern for him very much.

Tired out from the long day, they both went straight to bed. It wasn't until around noon the next day when the doctor called, confirming a CT scan he had set up for that day. Alan was taken aback, as he was used to things moving more slowly than that.

"What do you think it means?"he asked Mae, who was biting her lip nervously.

"I can't say," she lied through her teeth. It meant the doctor had found something abnormal and he needed a CT scan to clear it up and get a definitive diagnosis of what they had found. "come on Alan, let's not be late." he eyed her, noticing she had gotten a bit pale, but chose not to mention it.

The CT scan had to be done with a radiologic contrast material, much like the MRCP. Since he was in for a scan of the lungs and pancreas, he did not need the intestinal gastrografin that would make his colon and small intestine show up. A nurse put an IV catheter in the back of his right hand, instructed him to lie down feet first like the previous day, and put his hand up against the side of the CT scanner. The nurse connected the line to a machine that gave him a premeasured dose of the IV contrast material. The sensation of the material going into his veins gave him a warm feeling, a flush, and he swore at one point his tonsils were vibrating from the heat. As soon as the dose had been given to him, the feeling went away and he felt normal again.

Scanning only took a few minutes and as they were leaving the campus, Mae's cell phone rang. "Hello?" she listened for a minute and grasping Alan's arm, she steered him in the direction of the car. "That was the doctor. He wants to see us in an hour."

"Think something is really wrong?" she unlocked the car and hustled him into it,

"I'm not saying anything, I'm praying for good." Mae put the car in gear and hastily backed out of the parking space.

One hour later they were shown into the doctor's office where he greeted them with a somber look. In response to their questions, he flicked on a light board and showed them a copy of Alan's lung scan.

"You see the mass right here, it's poorly defined," he gestured with a pen. "this looks like a squamous cell carcinoma."

"Cancer?" Mae clutched at his arm. Alan did not say a word, frozen with shock.

"Yes and we're very fortunate we caught it so early on. I want to order a biopsy and I will refer you to a colleague of mine who specializes in lung cancer."

"All right." the doctor stood in front of them, leaning on his desk for a moment.

"I want to caution you that there is a lot of information available on the Internet about this. Here's a list of my most trusted sources," he handed them a leaflet. "I very strongly advise you to stick to these sources and nothing else. There's a LOT of misinformation out there as well and you shouldn't take everything out there seriously. Remember that your illness is unique to you and we don't know how it will act towards any specific treatments yet. Everyone's different." he emphasized.

Mae nodded and squeezed Alan's hand. "Thank you, doctor. Where do we go now?"

"Time is of the essence, so I'm booking you for a biopsy tomorrow morning. Here's all the information you will need. Do not hesitate to call if you have any questions." Alan felt his respect for the doctor go up as they took their leave.

Alan fingered the pamphlet as they headed home, opening it up and reading it. The title was Theraputic Bronchoscopy and featured a detailed drawing of the procedure. "Says here nothing to eat or drink after midnight. They'll sedate me and stick a fiberoptic tube down my throat to get the biopsy of the mass in my lung."

"Be glad you'll be sedated then." Mae signaled for a turn, nearly cutting off a man who was juggling lanes. "Blow it out your ass!"

The trumpet player grabbed the granny hook as he swore. "Calm down, will ya!" Mae always had a temper when she drove, attributing it to the nasty bad tempers of other New York drivers. He offered no argument, just mentally hung in there until they got home. He liked to think that even his driving habits and skills were better and his manners were ten times better, but Mae repeatedly told him he was wrong.

"All right," she entered their driveway about half an hour later. "I'm OK."

"No you're not," Alan got out of the car and took her hand. "you're in shock just like me. Let's keep this under control if we can."

"No guarantees," Mae agreed. "I need some time to unwind. I'll head over to Jack and Denise's place to see what's up."

"Good. I'm going over some of Julia's journals. It's been 12 years and I'm not through all of them yet."

"Suit yourself." she said and headed next door.

Alan wondered what Julia felt after she received her diagnosis and a chill went down his spine. It was odd that she'd left him her journals, almost like she knew what was going to happen to him. Funny feeling but he couldn't shake it. Danny had told him that Julia had been into the mythical and the supernatural, but Alan was a no-nonsense person, a genuine skeptic about the whole paranormal field.

Funny feeling ideed. He picked up the journal that he had started, sitting down on the lounger near the window.

"So the results are in. It's type 2 diabetes," he read. "funny when you've been diagnosed (or dx'd) with something how you can't learn about it fast enough. You become an immediate expert, though the doctors tell you that the disease is unique to the person infected or afflicted. Turns out Dad knew that the diabetes mellitus gene or hereditary factor or whatever it is was dormant in me, then that whatever it is has been switched on. My main objective now is to learn to live with it. It's odd that diabetes should rear itself up now when I'm in my twenties and not sooner like when I was in my teens. Funny how it all works out in the end. I'm not a raging hormonal hurricane like I was in my teen years, I'm an adult and I have my head on straight so I can deal with this. Well, I must accept that the Lord has been merciful to me in his own good way."

Pausing, he considered Julia's viewpoint. The more he thought on it, the more he knew she was right. It could have been worse, he could have been diagnosed much later in the process of the disease, a million other things could have made it much worse than it really was. People tended to overdramatize even the littlest things and Alan did not want to become one of them.

"I don't know how I'll sleep tonight. The fact that I have a disease that will be with me the rest of my life is very unnerving. Dad told me that he told Reggie about my diagnosis and Reggie with Mick will be coming over in the next few days to visit me. I've been in California for the past 6 months to train people for a movie, then when I get back I get sick, so yeah, they haven't seen me in a bit. I'm so fortunate that I have such friends around me and I'm not being facetious about it. I met Mick when he was around 14 years old, a tidal wave of teen angst and drama, he was frustrating his parents to no end. I have no siblings myself, but I've seen Dad counsel the young men on the construction crews he'd been on without even seeming to. He has a real gift, my dad, bringing out the best in people. I hope I can do the same with Mick."

"I bet," Alan muttered. "Mick was still impulsive when I heard from him last, but he's tapered it down considerably." he turned the page and found a note pasted into the journal. It was from Reggie, simply stating that he heard from her dad and was glad she was on the mend. The note was also signed by Mick and Suzie, the latter drawing a small betta fish in the corner. That must have been how Julia got interested in betta keeping, Alan decided. According to her journals, she had gone betta shopping with Mick at a local pet store, making sure he had the essentials, and he had decided on his fish by holding up the container, loudly proclaiming that it crapped a lot just like he did. Julia wrote that her face was red and she was glad the store was empty! Mick chose that fish purely because of that reason.

Julia had decided on her betta fish in a much better way, he remembered. She had told him that rather than loudly exclaiming that the fish crapped a lot, she eyed the fish, checked him over for signs of disease, activity, liveliness, etc. The fish that turned out to be Triton met her criteria and she had taken him home. Mick had given her one of the females she had as a present and she loved it.

"Alan, I'm back!" Mae's voice rang out through the house. "Come on down!" he closed the journal and put it away.

The bronchoscopy had gone smoothly, Alan and Mae followed all instructions to the letter. He had been given a topical anesthetic designed to numb his gag reflex, had to get into a hospital gown called a johnny, which he found demeaning. In the procedure room, he had chatted up the nurses and the doctor performing the procedure for a few minutes, then he'd been given a mouth ring designed to protect the endoscope from his teeth, and they had sedated him.

"Alan." he turned around, knowing that voice.

"Julia?" a shadow formed, coalescing into his late friend. She looked the same to him in face and body. He didn't know what to expect, her looking like airplane roadkill, but was glad to see her all the same. Her hair was pulled back at the sides and twisted so it met at the back of her head. Loose curls framed her face, she wore diamond stud earrings and a white long flowing dress. Alan couldn't ever remember seeing her look so beautiful before. Her dress had dropped sleeves and glittered at random with sequins scattered over the torso.

"I'm glad you're here," she smiled at him. "I've wanted to see you for a long time now."

"How? You're dead."

"That doesn't mean I can't see you in your dreams," she informed the musician. "I wanted to tell you that if you stay strong, you can beat this."

"I know."

"What is it you want to ask me?"

"Did you know it would happen to you? The crash?"

She sat down on a rock and he joined her, just now realizing they were in a flowery meadow in the middle of somewhere.

"I don't know even now," the dancer admitted. "I've had a nagging feeling during those last months I was alive and the reality hit that I should get my affairs in order because of the frequent traveling I did. It just made sense. Then I go down with a plane," she bit her lip. "all I remember is a lot of screaming, a knock to my head, and then nothing." Julia's voice broke. "Then I see my body lying broken!"

Alan winced. Too close to home for him. At a bit of a loss, he offered Julia a hug which she accepted. Despite himself, he let a few tears be shed as well. All the sorrow and loss hit him again like she had only died yesterday. He'd had several nightmares after Julia died, horrible visions of her dying in nasty plane crashes had haunted him for weeks after. Mae had to wake him up from a few of them herself when they got too intense.

"That reminds me, the journals." when she composed herself, she looked up at her friend as he spoke. "Why did you want me to have them?"

Julia gave him a slightly watery smile. "You reawakened something in me, Alan. The passion and desire for trumpet playing again. In those journals are my thoughts and some pieces I'd been composing. I meant to audition with them but I was flooded with theater season."

He raised an eyebrow, not satisfied with her explanation. She sighed. "I wanted you to know me, Alan. Not just the person I was to you, but who I was inside. I'd done some bad things, I allowed my life to stagnate. I also felt like I wasn't worthy of your friendship and Danny's. I thought that by letting you read my journals you'd be turned off of me."

"You tried to drive me away?" she nodded.

"In my past, I've revealed my true self to people," Julia chose her words carefully. "excluding Reggie and Mick mind you, and everyone was completely turned off me when they found out what kind of person that I am. A lot of people held me to a standard and when I didn't meet it, they ran away."

"Oh." he finally understood. Julia had been trying to cut her losses and spare herself some grief. "I haven't read them all yet but I do not think there's anything in those notebooks that could drive me out. I've done bad shit myself."

"I know. We're all human. We have our flaws. People always thought of me as a cold-hearted bitch because I never cried in public at my dad's funeral."

"People grieve differently."

"Yeah. You know I could not watch the movie Call of the Wild because the dog ends up alone in the wilderness with no human companion? That absolutely broke my heart and it was just a story!"

"It's proof you still have a heart," Alan argued. "I never doubted that of you. I thought you were an oddball sure, but I wasn't going to be revolted by you."

Julia gave a shaky laugh. "You're comforting me when I should be comforting you!"

"It's mutual," Alan soothed. "what else can you tell me?"

"To stay strong. Read my journals if you need comfort. I'll be there for you no matter what. You and Mae. Just call my name and I will be there."

"How can I tell that?"

"You will have a sense that you're not alone, that someone is right beside you when you need me to be." Julia pecked his forehead. "You will feel depressed from time to time and that's natural, but try not to be too depressed for long."

"All right." Alan muttered softly. "It's a long road we go down, isn't it?"

"It's ultimately rewarding." Julia gave him a slow smile. "Trust me."

"You'll wait for me?" he surprised himself by feeling a lump in his throat. Never would he think that Julia would become as dear to him as his family.

"I have all the time in the world." she promised with a mischievous glint in her eye. "It's time for you to wake up now." Alan closed his eyelids as they felt heavy to him all of a sudden.

Over the next year, Alan and Mae patiently fought the cancer which was trying to take a hold of him. He was subjected to chemotherapy and radiation treatments several times, though he tried to keep a hold on his sense of humor, he tried to keep the situation lighthearted. The musician spent several weeks at a cancer care center where he got cutting edge treatment, which eventually put him into remission.

There were times when he was depressed and he did call out Julia's name from time to time when he just couldn't take it anymore. Mae comforted him the best she could and he rewarded her by finally marrying her.

When he was asleep during his fits of depression, he would have vague memories of dreams that were of Julia holding him, comforting him through his ordeals, patiently counseling him. Alan read more of her journals, finding more entries of when her disease flared up and she had to spend a few weeks in the hospital herself. She spoke in the entries just what she was feeling, and he found that he could identify with what she felt and what she said. Alan took strength from her words, often quoting them to Mae.

One night he pulled down Julia's old trumpet where it had rested for the past 12 years and opened it up for the first time. The Yamaha gleamed at him like it had just been played yesterday, the silver mouthpiece shone in the light as well. A folder had been stuffed underneath the bottom shelf of the case which he pulled out.

A folded piece of notebook paper caught his eyes amid the sheet music. Julia's eloquent handwriting greeted him as he unfolded the notepaper, written in purple ink.

"Wonder what this is?" he cut the tape binding the letter together and began to read.

"Alan,

"I don't know what exactly possessed me to do this, i.e. bundle up all my trumpet things and bequeath them to you in case anything happens to me, but I thought I'd better pay attention to my instincts and do this. My instinct or intuition if you will keeps nagging me that something is going to happen to me. I don't know where or when, but something will happen. It won't be good, I might end up in a coma or worse.

"So these are all my pieces I've composed since we've met. You have a power over me and you helped me get re-inspired to play again. I owe you and I hope to be able to pay you back someday.

"As for my instinct, I keep getting dreams that something will happen to me that will be extremely bad. I think I am right in assuming that you don't hold with anything paranormal. Danny believes in it absolutely and what you don't know is that we had email conversations about this type of thing. He suggested people to help me sort out my instinct but I didn't need that. I only seemed to hear one word in my disturbing dreams which was prepare.

"So I have been preparing. I've appointed Reggie my power of attorney, set down my advance directive, and drew up a legally binding will which I am having notarized tomorrow. My mind keeps taking me to horrible places every night which end in me dying or comatose so I know something among either one of those lines will happen to me.

"Officially I leave my journals and music to you. Reggie has the instructions to my care if I should become unable to fend for myself.

"So I must say farewell, Alan. You've been a great friend and I can't thank you enough for what you've done for me. God bless and keep you safe.

"Much love, Julia Marion Holloway."

The musician was dimly aware of tears streaking down his face as Mae entered the room, wondering at what he was reading. He gave her the letter as he picked up a purple folder stuffed with sheet music. The first piece she had composed was for two trumpeters-a duet. Alan would have to get Tom Malone on his horn to play the piece through. They could cut an album and dedicate the piece to her as well.

Mae finished reading the letter and Alan knew by the hitch in her breath that she was breaking down into tears as well. He wiped his eyes and hugged his wife gently as she watched him go through his late friend's music.

Several pieces were unearthed, some dark and gloomy, but many were very upbeat and perky. Julia had also tried composing lyrics but had apparently given up on that. The last section of her lyrics had been crossed out with the word CRAP written over them. Mae didn't think that they were crap, wondering if she could take them to twist a little bit and make them better. She would credit Julia of course, knowing that the lyrics needed some polishing, though in the end they could work.

"Why didn't she come to me?" Mae mused as they put the folder away.

"Lyric writing wasn't her strong suite," Alan reminded her. "she was a dancer first and foremost."

"True." just then the phone rang.

"Who was that?" Alan sat down on the bed as his wife came into the room with a look of barely suppressed glee.

"Your oncologist," she replied, sitting down next to him. "you're in remission now!"

"Yay!" he gave her a smooch. "Time to get to work!"

That next year, Alan and Tom Malone worked on Julia's music, scoring it and recording it in the studio. They chose the picture that Danny had taken of Alan and Julia dancing so many years ago and used it as the tribute photo for the album sleeve. Alan had written the introduction for the album, which he named Shine Bright.

"Thirteen years ago I met a young woman by the name of Julia Holloway. She was a talented choreographer, doing moves that made my jaw fall open several times. We were doing the Blues Brothers 2000 and word came to me that she played the trumpet in her spare time. I influenced her to start playing again and we became friends. Unfortunately her light was snuffed out by a plane accident, and she had left all her musical compositions to me to do with as I see fit. I took them and with Tom Malone, we turned the music into a CD, because her work should be heard by everyone, not just a select few. The highlight of this work is a song she composed called Shine Bright, the title of this CD as well. You were great to me Julia, and I miss you every day. I hope I have done you justice with this album. Until we meet again."

In 2011, Alan knew his cancer was coming back. He and Mae got treatment for it, but by the beginning of June, he knew his time was running out.

The trumpet player was too ill to get out of bed, too weak to do anything but talk to Mae as she welded herself to his side.

"It's time," Julia's voice came to him. "are you ready?"

"Yeah." Mae gasped as she saw a luminescent cloud form near her husband. Stunned, she watched as the figure came together into a recognizable one of their late friend.

"Hi, Mae."

"Julia?"

"Yes. Alan has to come with me now. He can't take this anymore, he doesn't want to suffer."

"I don't want him to suffer either." she brushed aside tears from her eyes. Julia crossed over to her and touched her hand.

"He won't leave you. We will be looking after you until you join us." she knew the words didn't have much comfort in them, but Mae nodded and gave her a timid smile.

"I hate to see him like this. Please take him."

"All right." she stood by Alan's form, which was barely breathing. "You might feel overwhelmed and you may faint, Mae." the writer looked confused but didn't challenge what Julia had told her.

The specter extended her hands into Alan's body and pulled out his soul easily like she was hanging out a blanket to dry. The soul looked just like he had in life, albeit without the disease leaving its mark on him. Alan looked more like himself in 1980 with black hair and the age lines gone. He looked at Julia, who looked exactly the same since the last time he'd seen her in a drug-induced dream almost 2 years ago.

Alan stared at her and said her name, she nodded and smiled. Mae stared as they turned to her, and she made the gesture to go forth. Julia said something to Alan, who approached his wife, kissed her, then disappeared with Julia.

"So this is the afterlife, eh?" they soared upwards into the sky.

"That's right. We can be anywhere at any time."

"Meet up with your dad?"

"Of course!" Julia's laugh reminded him of wind chimes. It was the first time that he'd heard her laugh in such a way. "We're free, Alan. Nothing can hurt us anymore."

"I guess so!"

"So what do you say you teach Gabriel how to blow that trumpet loud and true, eh? He could use a lesson." the musician burst out laughing as they disappeared into the sky.  
THE END


End file.
